reflective p

pretty amused by all the hullabaloo going on as the election day draws closer.

feels like a stirred up concoction of soil and water, it's all murky now. people getting all emotional with how 'oppressed' we've been under all these years. and how something 'new' will literally set us free.

i often walk pass this koi bubble tea at clementi. i read people craving for their gong cha over the facebook news feed. yet till now, i've not tried it nor do i think i'll do so any time soon. shortly after the success of koi, recently i got to know more of such bubble tea shops popping up.

it's like a reminiscence of the bubble tea bubble some years back. remember how so many bubble tea shops sprouted so rapidly, people were queuing for it..and then after a short period of a year, many folded.

i'm not sure if such a stir-up is exactly good. does it help us make better decisions?

i don't like the fact because the stir up is in its ever all time high that i am seeing unknown people coming in to contest for a bit of a pie.

for now i'm going to take a indifferent stance. so much for rising costs, i'm going to off to work to bring back more. i know to stay ahead is much how i want to deal with it, instead of pointing finger at the government for doing not enough to help. am i even trying to help myself to begin with?

ill fitting me

i think my waredrobe is getting very out of date. i can't remember when was the last time i bought a new dress. the latest additions were giveaways from friends.

i look at fashion with little interest these days. i'm not sure what suits me as i hardly go shopping..and hence i don't try on many new clothes either.

i browse some online blogshops but i cannot imagine myself in those tubes, dresses and skirts.

as my clothes grow ill fitting, i pack them into bags and tuck them into the store room.

strangely, many of the clothes i used to like somehow seem really out of fashion sense..and for some reason i am finding them sticking on my body at the wrong places.

so a part of me is thinking i ought to go out shopping more. another part of me looks at myself and wonder what should i be wearing. then the last part of me looks at my expenditure list and think i can probably put off shopping for another month or so (i'm thinking my money can be saved up for a holiday or grand instead?)

can't figure what to do with myself. =(

broke my mug

I broke the magnetic mug my mum gave me. Remember the last time I broke my mug when I was leaving vv in dec 2009. I received my confirmation letter on 18 april and I broke my mug on 19 april. Is that a sign that my days are numbered? O_O

I am gradually finding more focus in my work these days. It is about that edge over others. I do lack those years of experience compared to many around me, but what can I then excel upon? What do I have that others may not or may have neglected in developing? Can I find something that I can specialize at, such that it helps me narrow that differential between my colleagues and I?

And so, I found there can be things I can be good at and if I did it to my best, it can give me some leverage. But it means asking more questions, finding more answers, seeking to understand things beyond face value, thinking ahead of what may be asked instead of scrambling for an answer only when questioned.

Will this way work? No one can tell but it’s worth the try.

poli-what?

i'm no political correspondent or observer.. but just a few observations as ge draws nearer.

we watched the questions with pm programme yesterday and it made me think.

the burning issues that have been asked repeatedly(like a broken record).. my first thoughts were: these are things that are not caused by the government. why not blame the rising prices on natural disasters and food shortages. food at its source is getting more expensive.. naturally we will see that cup of kopi costing us more now.

i think workforce these days is mobile. globalisation. when singaporeans move to work in a foreign land, aren't we foreign talent too? would we not hope those countries will welcome us and not shut us off like plague?

creating more jobs. upgrading of skills. these are the ways we will stay competitive. so will you rather the government hands out billions of welfare every year..people rather live off welfare than seek employment? (i can already think of a country which is facing this problem)

we lament foreigners taking away our jobs..but how many out of us are ready to take on construction work.. retail work? we are choosy to begin with. those from the foreign lands are willing to take on anything that earns them a decent living.

oh yes..and about the priority in upgrading of estates. logically think about it. if another party is in ruling, will that party give the opposition priority such upgrading projects too? will they not consider their own parties' constituencies first? aiya, it's human nature right?

dearie received a handout on someone contesting in our constituency whom i've never met..nor did his introduction seem to contain any work amongst the dwellers here. why would you make me think you make a representation to our views? just because you have some roll of scholastic achievements? i dumped the handout away shortly after glancing through it. i don't think i'll want to vote him for the sake of 'not voting the ruling party'..nor will i want to vote for someone who only appears during ge.

i think even if some other parties ruled our country, those issues will not dissipate over night. these will still be issues tussled over and over again. not simply just faced by us, but in fact globally.

while everyone is just concerned of the problem itself, why not make change at the source? if we are losing out in terms of employment, then retraining and upgrading is the way to stay ahead, if not on par. it's about time we shed that pampered child attitude and expect our parents to continue to fill our pockets when we are not even taking effort to earn ourselves a decent living.

i hope i don't find blue men knocking at my door for coffee. =P

how much more is needed

i had the privilege to attend the project dinner organised by the ceo. it's an honour getting to know and be introduced to him.

i was the smallest in the group of 10. the group made up of managers, head, deputy head..while i was just a mere executive.

it made me really want to do more and move up faster. knowing i am not gifted, i must work harder. then again, there must be opportunities. if i do not get the opportunities, how then can i at least earn some brownie points in the meantime?

to be honest i don't know too.

studying feels abit out of scope. i cannot afford the fees of another course though i won't mind allocating time to do so.

volunteer somewhere which can gain more relevant experience? like what?

sign up for some short courses perhaps? do u know how costly courses are these days?

dearie says i think too much.. just do my best in excelling in what i do now..take things one at a time..

but i feel for someone like me, a lateboomer, i do have to catch up on lost time. like i've grown up in a not so well to do environment, the scarcity of money taught me to value it more.

work hard. very hard. and let's hope it will get me somewhere!

work never ends

work has been hectic. i barely had time and energy to run much in the past week. i only managed to run twice of 8km each. it's pathetic.

overtime feels like a friend now.

busy but i am learning alot. it's difficult but at least i feel i'm pushing my limits each time.

finally got my confirmation too. yay!

my boss asked me if work is interesting. i replied, "hmm. challenging."

i felt i've been strolling in the park in the past. now i'm running; chasing to catch up with the rest.

i actually had to bring work home to go through over the weekend. now i'm trying to get access to work too.

dearie said i should give up the part time job. but i do enjoy the work there. boss is nice. kids are nice. work is relatively easy too. and it's extra cash i can get to save up too.

for the many reasons, i have to keep my head up and keep treading on!

crash out access

i've never been a very technically inclined person. i remember crying over a crashed pc which i helplessly could not handle.

i'm here trying my hands on microsoft access. a programme i've never used before. attempting to use it for treasury management.

i'm wondering if i'm being 'backside itchy'. there are afterall reports which have been created for the various functions; i can easily just keep up with them. yet, i am trying to find a better way around it. centralise the information. integrate the sources of information so that it can be easily available in one place. find ways to improve the processes, make it less manual.

but it's really making my head crack. it's like a trial and error process here. i do not have access in the office. to get it installed will mean license cost. i have to be very sure i need it before i justify the need to have it installed. in the meantime, i am still grappling with how to use it, how can i possibly justify?

i need a dummy's guide.

am i trying too hard?

my boss says it's value add. but i am not even sure if i'll be adding value at the end of it? until i can make things work in access, i have to keep up with the current reports. so it's like parallel running 2 things. it'll be worth the work if we know the new way will take off. however, for now, it's still a big question mark.