there's truth in this

extracted from a book on human resource management.

it can be so true, isn't it?

if and only if

I think I have Seasonal Affective Disorder. The rain makes me sulk. Being able to run on a dry day is bliss. I will soon become a depressive if the rain does not come to a halt soon.

I haven’t made any good progress in my hill training recently. my best time for yesterday’s hills is 2 seconds slower than my personal best last month. Bleah.

I started on a new workout I found on runner’s world magazine. I’m not expecting it to work miracles on slow-coach tricia, but I would try any methods that’ll keep me running harder.

After much deliberation, I decided to quit the job at RL. There are 3 reasons I would keep staying on and handfuls of reasons I’ll want to leave. After weighing out the opportunity costs, I felt to opt out of the job is the better option. There was already some accumulation of unhappiness through the months and I felt by staying on it would just add on to it. Instead of letting myself become more disgruntle with the situation, I’ll rather bail myself out of it now.

If, and only if (dream on), things could end a good note, I hope I could get that $200 voucher that I thought I should have be entitled to but never gotten. Yati once helped me ask about it but as the pre-requisite was to clock 240hrs in 3 months, I never got close to it. Not even after working there for the past 2yrs+, not even when I have been running with velocity since its founding days. I remember recce runs with Kelvin, Sebastian, Thomas, mr guava and iskandar before we launched velocity. I remember organizing a trail relay challenge, which I managed to gather a small group of velocity runners for a morning of fun at macritchie. so I thought I was a volunteer, but to management, I’m not.

It’s disappointing how the system works some times. i'm tired of being a pawn on it.

Well, i guess the last thing I could get for myself for all the work done is a decent testimonial.

I learnt from my part time work: don’t expect too much, so there won’t be disappointment. The more you hope for, the more disappointed you’ll be when it doesn’t happen. When you expect nothing and something comes along, it’ll be an added surprise.

All I am asking for a testimonial and nothing more, so don’t relinquish the little hope that remains.

shoo rain

I hate rain, most of the time.

I only love the rain when I’ve finished my work, completed my training and I’m ready to jump into bed. The rain makes it cooling for a nice sleep.

Yet, 90% of the time I hate it.

I hate getting my shoes wet and having to wear them on makes my feet cold and damp. I feel like it’s ready to go mouldy already!

The rain makes the atmosphere so humid; it takes eons to dry my laundry.

I hate not being able to train – no running, no swimming and no biking outside. I hate hate hate it.

The cold weather makes one go hungry fast. And in turn, I end up eating more.

No exercise + More food = Fat Tricia

I feel miserable when it rains. I can only stand indoor, look up into the sky and lament, “when is this going to stop?”

Rain, rain, go away!

going on & giving up

I had a shitty task to do yesterday and I confess I grumbled at the start of it.

Why am I doing it?

Shit. So many pages. When am I going to finish?

Can tie or not? So many entries, I make one mistake that’s it. can’t reconcile again.

They didn’t manage to reconcile it last year what.

I whined, I ranted and I had to curb a temper that was flaring from within.

But I peservered.

As mr guava sms-ed me to pacify me, the better part of me gradually took over.

I can do it.

I must tie it.

Who says they can’t do it last year means I can’t do it this year?

Jia you. finishing soon. I can do it by today.

Before I leave work today I must make sure I reconcile this.

With almost 7million worth of transactions, 25+56 pages of listing from both companies and a $300k difference to reconcile, I did it.

Yes, I did it before I left work yesterday. At the stroke of 5pm, I stood up with glee, yes! I reconciled it!

There was a sweet sense of satisfaction, akin to the feeling of crossing the finishing line at the end of a marathon.

I’m just glad I didn’t give up on the task, nor gave up on myself.

Sometimes, it’s that bit of perseverance that makes the difference from going on and giving up.

luck? work harder

christin and i met up for a brainstorm session(obu paper).. it was not just a good time of talking about the project, we shared updates in our lives too..and before we parted for the night, we cheered each other on to press on in life..

i sms-ed her.. "we must work hard for our dreams..because we have dreams, so that hard work is worth it".

i like what i found in my fortune cookie last wk for it reminded me not to lament on not being lucky..but to review on myself whether i've worked hard enough.

"Don't always depend on luck, work harder".

reach for the dream

Dreams. We talked about dreams yesterday.

We dream that one day we would be successful. I dream that one day I would be dorned in a powersuit armed with my laptop and carrying myself with diginity and pride.

I dream one day I would do well enough to get into a varsity. I always feel this is a part of my life I missed out on – to be a part of a large varsity, to study within a campus. I’ve never experienced campus life, I’ve never gone through a convocation nor shook a dean’s hand. I dream one day I can do that.

Amusingly, my dream 2 years ago during this same time of the year was to complete an ironman. My whole body and mind just felt it was a dream I must pursue and I must accomplish in my life time. To my own dismay, I’ve never attained that dream.

Knowing mr guava changed my perspective. I began to ask myself what matters more in life. at the end of the day, I could cross the finishing line of the ironman race but yet still be a nobody in life. doing ironman does not make a nobody turn into somebody. (neither does going to jean yip do that)

What makes a nobody become somebody is how hard ms nobody is going to work and strive. To upgrade myself constantly, to read vivaciously, to learn keenly and to love with no inhabitation. There’s a limitless sky up there to soar on; don’t just be satisfied rolling in the mud pile.

I am telling myself I’m not going to resign stopping where I am now. I must move on and move UP. The desire to learn should be like an interminable thirst that has to be quenched; a flame that has to be fuelled constantly.

The voyage to greater heights can often be peppered with hindrances – treacherous storms and towering waves. Nonetheless, I know when I look over my shoulder, there will be people I love, standing by me all the way.

Knowing the goal makes getting there, a whole lot easier. =) and the process, a whole lot more meaningful.

Reach (Gloria Estefan)

Some dreams live on in time forever
Those dreams, you want with all your heart
And I'll do whatever it takes
Follow through with the promise I made
Put it all on the line
What I hoped for at last would be mine

If I could reach, higher
Just for one moment touch the sky
From that one moment in my life
I'm gonna be stronger
Know that I've tried my very best
I'd put my spirit to the test
If I could reach

Some days are meant to be remembered
Those days we rise above the stars
So I'll go the distance this time
Seeing more the higher I climb
That the more I believe
All the more that this dream will be mine

If I could reach, higher
Just for one moment touch the sky
From that one moment in my life
Im gonna be stronger
Know that Ive tried my very best
Id put my spirit to the test
If I could reach

rl woes

I thought about devoting more time into the upcoming research paper. I’ve yet to get into full gear ahead but I thought if I would want to put more weekends into it. that’ll probably jeopardize my job at rl..which I’ve been hanging on for a few reasons. I’ve got to rant about the fact that discounts are no longer attractive nor are there any sponsorships I’ve heard about for this year. There are no pull factors, apart from the pay, that’ll make me want to stay on.

It started pretty well, to be honest. However, there’ve been so much cut in the perks these days. In fact, mr guava would be getting $200 sponsorship for being a volunteer runner, but how about me? (being there on Tuesdays for the runs, for nothing!bleah!) I’ve worked for 2yrs+ at rl and I’ve never qualified for this sponsorship either.

Seems like being a volunteer counts better than being a part time staff.

Sian.

If I quit being a staff, mr guava would still be entitled to staff purchase for being a volunteer. And I might just sign up as volunteer too, anyway when mr guava goes for the runs, I’m always there too.

1 more month before announcement of pay increment. Let’s pray I get one that’s substantial enough, then I’ll probably quit rl.

So much for rl woes. On the flip side of the coin, by working 5mths at rl, I’ll be able to afford the pink sony cr-35! Vanity! Vanity!!

oh look! the cr35 in white which mr guava says it's pretty!

sweet fetish

As we were conversing in the car during the weekend, mr guava brought into perspective the likelihood of getting a new laptop if my studies require. I’ll definitely be working a lot more on the laptop and when I have to present my research paper, I must have my own laptop to do so. I can’t possibly borrow ct’s laptop (she has to work too) and I’m currently using a desktop in the office.

However, as I tussle with the vanity, I know my dell laptop is working well (erm,notwithstanding the occasional virus alert pop-up) and the only thing I often whine about is its size and weight. Apart from that, I really haven’t got much to complain about it. It’s slightly over 3 years old (can’t remember exactly how old but I got it during NL time which was I think should be late 04- early 05 period). I had no idea what kind to get and what to look out for, hence I simply yi-ni-mi-ni-ma-ni-mo one off the dell brochure I receive every now and then kiap-ed in between my daily Straits Times.

It’s just a vanity thing I concur with the devilish side of me and the sony cr 35 really gets my eyes popping out large O_o pinkkkk! Irresistible pink! It’s really sweet. Sweet. Sweet!!

Sweetness comes with a whopping price tag of $1,999!! O_O sigh. If I hadn’t got to pay the hefty amount for the subscription, I would have loved to bag this baby home.

Hence after rationalizing that I would probably need the money for travel, I’m somehow going to let go of the idea.= (

Or perhaps, I might just earn enough from my part time job to get myself a decent laptop that isn’t so expensive.

Gosh. See la. That’s how money makes the world go round. No money, can only just stand outside the shop and drool. Can see, can feel, but cannot bring home and own it.

I feel like the hungry kid starving for days, pasting her face on the bakery, staring and drooling hungrily at the freshly baked bread. Reaching into my pocket, I only find $0.50, not even enough to buy a bun these days. Feeling disheartened, I can only swallow hard and walk away miserably. $0.50 enough to buy some sweets from the mama shop. Unwrapping the hacks lemon sweet, I slowly place it on my tongue. Taking my time to savour its sweetness and letting that sweetness numb the disappointment that this is all I can afford. Indeed, money does make the world go round, doesn’t it?

staying alive

It’s been mystifying at work – ct has been really distracted, her instructions had been incomplete and her focus often divided. Hear say that she’s been having thyroid problems; today she’ll be going for tests. Probably that’s why her attention is divided. Most people stopped wondering if she’ll be leaving and decided to let time tell. How long a time? we can only wait.

I’m quite on track with training these days. I set for myself relatively easy targets to fulfill and last week, I managed to meet all my targets, with some exceeding my target. It’s really heartening to know and a great boost to my morale. It shows I can do it with determination. =)

Having increase some mileage for this week, I hope to do the same – meet the targets again.

My trainers are being put to good use for the past weeks. Fully utilizing it. I’ve been putting rerun of devil beside me while I spin.. the series won’t last me very long though. Have to find more Taiwan/Korea soppy shows to keep my attention on during spins. Just like I’m stingy with books I buy, I’ve never purchased any drama series on dvd/vcd before. A series alone costs at least $30 and the stingy part of me would not bear to part with $30 for a stack of discs. Sometimes my friends would be kind enough to lend theirs to me and I get to watch the show for free! =D

It’s a leap year, 2008. that simply means we’ve got to work an extra day this year! Feb 29. they ought to declare leap day of the leap year a HOLIDAY!!

Hearing the race report on tokyo marathon from Isabel really made me yearn to be there myself to experience the awesome atmosphere. I got really envious of how she could get a free ticket with her miles points and travel to Tokyo for a week. I’m really conscious about my savings these days; I want to have enough for the Melbourne trip as well as enough to do some studies come end of the year. I’ve only got a bowl of rice with 3 mouths to feed – my own, my trip and my studies. Sometimes the amount once spread out gets a little thin..so I barely get by.

Reading the inflation rate for 2007 of 6.6% made me shudder in fear of what next Singapore will become.

Rising prices are inevitable as Singapore sees major events coming to town in the next 2 years – youth Olympic.. F1.. integrated resort (yes, the casino).. with the market opening and more tourists coming..land becoming scarce..more competition.. more demand.. supply remaining constant.. prices will definitely go UP, UP and away!

With the tide becoming higher and currents moving faster, we have to get stronger so we can stay with the pack. It’s easy to get washed off with the under currents..if we don’t put in enough effort we might end up just staying in the same spot. The only way is to train ourselves mentally to be able to face up with the oncoming and press on.

Don’t say it’s not of your nature to be competitive. In this society, one cannot survive if he/she doesn’t stay competitive. Sometimes it’s this competition that keeps us on the edge and alive.

whey drinking

The last thing I wanted to do yesterday was to swim..but in the end I took mr guava’s encouragement, went to the pool, jumped into it and swam 3km.

I’m just thankful to have him around, pressing me on even on days I feel like throwing in the towel.

Aftermath of the long swim (after a hiatus of 2weeks from swimming), are aching lats which mr guava promised to give a good massage of tonight. Yippee!

Stepping off is always the toughest, and sometimes we just need that little nudge in the rib.

The 2 bottles of whey expires in a year’s time. I’m going to attempt to start a good habit of drinking half to one serving of whey per day. It’ll probably help with the satiety from lunch; I’ll try to eat lesser junk and drink good protein.

Will start today, as I’m really aching badly. The protein will be welcomed for faster tissue repair.

I’ll be going off from work at 2pm to head down to get the stitches removed. After which it’ll be to my mum’s shop as my colleagues will be having a mini gathering there this evening.

Something seems to be brewing within the office – uncertainty.

Mr guava has made plans to shuttle in between home and kl in order to make it for the kl marathon. I don’t want to put him in a difficult position and I’ve suggested to opt out of the run. It’ll be quite a rush as he has to drive home and then drive up to kl to do the run, and at the end, drive back Singapore. The weekend will be really draining as driving requires focus and it’s tiring. The kl marathon was meant to be the year’s warm up for other runs, but if it’s going to wear us down more than build us up, I’ll pass on it. anyway we haven’t paid for anything, so we can still pull out. =)

Update: 10:19am I just drank whey. It actually tastes pretty ok even without milk. I felt a little hungry..so that helps keep hunger away for a while =P

tentative race plan 2008

after much deliberation, mr guava and i have come up with the following race plan.

we did away with the phuket marathon considering the budget and time constraints. there are also some races which are not confirmed, so we're not going to waste time guessing. no need to plan training for them too. so we'll just focus on those that are more or less firmed.

feb: no races. only left 2 weeks. will be ramping up some basal mileage for kl marathon to get us through the distance.

30 mar: KL Marathon (a warm up for 2008 as we don't have alot of time to train for it. no big plans for pb. just want to use this race to gain inertia for the other races. keeping logistics n budget minimal.)

apr: no races. using 5 weeks to train for A'Famosa Tri. get some good bike mileage and swim speed. at the same time got to mix it up with more off road running for jun.

10 may: A'Famosa Tri. OD.

08 jun: mr25 cross country marathon. (cut off is 5hours. not an issue to mr guava but abit more worrying for me. so have to really train up for this. after this, cut down running, ramp up bike n swim.)

19 jul: PD Tri. OD. (cut down swim, ramp up run)

aug: army half marathon. (good milestone training run for melbourne. after this, do more biking on mtb)

sep: safra avventura (it's a fun race! else my mtb collect alot of dust la. in the mean time, continue to ramp up good speed training for melbourne.)

12 oct: MELBOURNE MARATHON (this is the highlight of 2008. i am aiming for my pb for this race. all i'm training for is this!!)

09 nov: powerman? i'm still pro-duathlon. =P but not sure if we'll want to travel up to perak for it.

07 dec: scsm. how can we miss this? will do for sure. it's a good jump board before the ultra. must use this to keep us on track.

end dec: mr25 ultramarathon. my goal is 8laps. period.

it's a fast n furious 2008 for mr guava and i. now abit on the low note but i'm sure we'll get into the action of things. tonight will map out more details for training.

woohoooooooo! billy tricia, jia you jia you jia you!!

days of chocolate ice-cream

this is a nonsense post. a random rambling from a bored soul.

i'll be taking today as the last day of mc; it's back to work tomorrow for me though my mc officially ends 20th feb.

have been talking alot, thinking alot and tossing alot with mr guava.

we explored into the possible options in the long term, we implored at the circumstances that may arise in mid term..and we also planned a little to what challenges we can give ourselves in the short term.

toiling from day to day at work, just to earn enough a decent living and save some for the rainy days..that's life we sometimes call it. all these don't always go the way we want them to, unfortunately.. and many a times, opportunities don't just come knocking your door every other day. so while we tumble and lumber along, like travelling on the expressway looking out for the right exit to reach the destination, we've also got to find channels to keep ourselves sane.

idle. i'm too much in the idle mode i can't decide if i'm hungry or not.

grrr.

my pc has virus. grrrrrrr!

i'll give x-physique a miss. $50/pax! i must be out of my mind.

my house is clean. i've done all the housework for the day.

i want to run more. i think i haven't been running enough to do my shoes justice.

been doing my spinning at home consistently. that's good.

must plan for races. it's fun to be part of the action..but why are they raising the entry fee every year? singapore races are getting too atrocious to join sometimes. $65 for a marathon? i must be really out of my mind..

i think it'll be more fun to save the money for malaysian races. it's more fun running places we don't do in singapore everyday. for a change.

plan plan plan. execute execute.

must plan ahead.

so we're not planning for chocolate ice cream la.

must run more ultras..if not no chocolate ice cream.

Remnants of wisdom

Remnants from the wisdom tooth extraction. I think the cui cui ones come from the bottom row, while the nice whole ones probably come from the top row.

looking at it makes me go "ouch"!

day 2 after surgery

day 2: i looked into the mirror and i found i look like a fishball. o_O

CNY@Segamat Photoblog Part 3

john feeding alicia with his er..not so nicely done california roll. laughs.











the extended family gathering.








shou tao. very nicely coloured and done. taste really soft too.








aunty's curry fish which was wiped out quickly! =D








mr guava: eating (again) hahaha

CNY@Segamat Photoblog Part 2

LO HEI!!








Steamboat with alot of goodies!








fri: we made sushi for lunch. look at our attempts of california rolls and maki rolls!










mr guava: eating as usual =P











wendy's the first to come up with the maki roll. she topped it with tuna..yummy!!

CNY@Segamat Photoblog Part 1

first meal of the day. we had yummy fried bee hoon, chilli ikan bilis and fried egg. can identify who cooked which egg?







sunday we went to melaka for shopping and had SATAY CELUP! it's like lok lok only that u dip the sticks into satay sauce (read: super sinful). mr guava set the record of 15sticks. i think wendy and i tied with 13sticks each.






after satay celup, we went to tan kim hock and had durian chendol!








task for the kids: paint the gate. we (wendy, mr guava, john, alicia and i) easily completed the task in 3hours!








LO HEI on thursday! followed by steam boat lunch with the entire family present.

wisdom+pain

i underwent a surgery to remove all 4 wisdom teeth yesterday. it was a painful experience and my face swelled up quite abit.

i'm making good recovery though. the swell has subsided. i could eat my mum's almond cookies and nibble on soft snacks.

life's a contradiction. now that i'm on mc, i wish i was busy at work. when i was working, i wish i had mc to rest at home.

i'll be on mc till 20th but i reckon i'll be back before then. it's good to stay busy. i want a good performance bonus too.

the rest is much welcomed though. i sorted some photos to be put for development so that mr guava and i can fill up our newly bought photo album. nothing beats the hard copy sometimes. flipping through an album sure is a better experience than scrolling down the folders.

i've ironed all the clothes. swept the floor. updated my monthly budget.

tonight mr guava promised he'll go jogging with me. i want to stay in shape for the north face 100 race.

love in its simplest form

happy valentine's day to you, my friend.

today's the day when many couple trot the streets with bouquets, balloons and chocolates.

basically, mr guava has prepared nothing for me and neither have i prepared anything in return. geez. how unromantic.

well, i promised i'd cook dinner - porridge, coz that's what i can best swallow now. and mr guava promised he'll eat porridge with me.

love expressed in giving and taking. love expressed in listening and understanding. love expressed in a peck on the cheek before he leaves for work in the morning. that's love in its simplest form.

no need for fancy gifts nor tall promises. just a nod of trust, a hug full of warmth and a hand to hold for strength.

these are what money can never buy.

one pot full

After a long week of break from work, computers and training, my body feels sluggish this morning as I prepped myself for a short spin on the trainer. A pure week of indulgence and lumbering around, I simply fall into a state of “nuah-ness”.

The time off gave me moments to reflect through the time which has passed, the time I am living for now, and the time that is to come. Sighing to the things I wish I have done and had, envisaging the things that are to come which I must grasp.

Before we went into slumber last night, I whispered to mr guava, our lives is a long race – It’s not about how fast we sprint at the start but more about starting slow, maintaining a good pace and staying in the race. We are ultramarathoners! Long distance is our forte. =)

So it’s back to work today..back to training..and gearing up for the challenges to come.

After some consideration, I will hang on to the rl job as I do want to save extra for the upcoming trips. The honest fact is my full time job doesn’t give me a pay I can grin about; but to be grateful, it is suffice for survival. On the maslow’s hierarchy of needs, it fundamentally fulfills our basic needs but doesn’t come close to the peak of self-realisation.

I found myself unknowingly googling on “how to earn more money”. It’s always the moolah issue. Are we any happier if we had more of it? or would we be starve if we had lesser of it?

In our small little ways, it’s pure joy to see our savings grow gradually. Sedikit sedikit, lama lama, jadi bukit. (little by little, bit by bit, it grows into a hill). Though I don’t see the numbers jump a few folds but like water trickling in, I know it’ll fill our bowls full.

小发发

小发发恭祝大家新年快乐!


愿大家发发发,发大财!!!!!

all bikes and wheels merely players

"All the world 's a stage, and all the bikes and wheels merely players. They have their exits and their entrances; And one wheel in its time plays many parts"


as tania departs, radar arrives. this will be the new addition mr guava and i will be getting for neon. after sourcing around, i will go with ben's recommendation and get this.

tomorrow i start spinning again. ho ho ho!

Ave et Vale

tania left with a nice guy named merill yesterday.

as i gave it a last look and saw him push her away, i know she'll be in good hands. he'll put her in good use.

i'll miss her and all the places she has travelled with me.

Ave et vale. may we meet again some day! on the road! =)

still spinning

Tricia managed to keep up with the 2^nd day of morning spin. And what’s worth giving myself a pat on the back is – I woke up at 5:05am and promptly started spinning at 5:10am. I extended the session by 5mins over yesterday’s 30min. I hope to keep that up for the entire week if possible,

There are more people enquiring on the bike and a guy came to view it yesterday. He’s a newbie sourcing for his first bike. Today he texted mr guava (my dearie’s new nick) to ask for a further reduction of price..but 1.6k is the lowest we are willing to part with the bike. After all, I paid slightly more than 3k for the bike..with the new bar tape and new tires.. I won’t go any lower than that.

Mr guava and I are hoping to sell off the bike before we leave for cny on Saturday..at least that’ll be one load off our minds.

Another hour before I end work. Honestly, I’m just totally jaded now. I need to run..after wolfing down the extra 2 slices of mulit grain bread..i better do so. Run some hills then hit the flats with the rest of velocity gang.

And then what? WAFFLE! My peanut butter WAFFLE! Muhahaha. That’s one reason why we train hard – to EAT!

all spun up in the morning

I’m feeling hyped up today. Finally, I’ve managed to move my butt out of bed to spin in the morning. I set my alarm at 4:45am, 5am and 5:30am. In the end I only managed to get myself out of bed at 5:15am. I just had to snooze it a few times before the determination kicked in to propel me out of bed.

Somehow getting the motivation to gain inertia is very uplifting. I must keep up with this. My goal is to gain enough biking fitness to complete A Famosa well.

I’ve dropped the price of my bike further, in hope that someone would pick it up and make good use to it. it’s a good bike and I sure would miss riding it.. however, I do agree with the fact that I don’t have much use of it if I start training on neon more. Moreover, it’s more important that I get training wheels for neon now so that I’ll start riding it more. At the end of the day, that’s the bike I’ll race with, so it only makes sense that I train with it.

There’ll be a guy viewing it tonight. I’ll set it up on the trainer for him. With the cheap price I’m letting it go at, I’ll not change the stem for the buyer. He has to find his own stem and change it to the length he’ll be comfortable with.

I’ve got 2 options for 650c wheels – ambrioso and xero lite. I’ve emailed tbb to find out when their stock is coming in but no reply as yet. Well if they don’t get back to me, I’ll go for ambrioso. Maybe small time purchases like mine not worth the time of tbb..unlike ben who really takes effort to source the wheelset for me and reply my email promptly.

If there’s anything I need to get, the first place I’ll ask has to be C2C. it’s still my all-time favourite bike shop. Thumbs up for Ben!

I am sooooo looking forward to the long week of break coming my way. counting down now.. 5 more days then off to Segamat we go.

Somehow having that in mind makes going through the week of work a lot more bearable..because the break is oh-so-near!

when your $ is my $, and my $ is my $

our first joint account.. finally got around getting it done. this is our travel fund.. we'll put in $200 each per month and whatever amount accumulates, we'll use it for our phuket and melbourne trip. =)

of course if not enough then we top up with our other savings lor.

tricia's wishlist 2008

1. Savings & Investment

Primarily to work hard for a good bonus and pay rise so that dearie and I can be even more financially stable. I do hope we can start an investment account to diverse our savings by year end of 2008.

Action:

- to start monthly budget and expenses tracking starting Feb 08, in order to enable better monitoring of cash flow and plan for future savings.

- Start a joint account with dearie to set aside more money monthly.(DONE!)

- Not sure how much I can save because there will be more spendings for travel (as mentioned below), but I’ll still make sure to set aside a reasonable amount monthly.

2. Travel

Dearie and I plan to go 2 places for this year – Phuket & Melbourne. I really want to bring my mum along to Melbourne for a holiday. I’ve never done so in my life and she deserves it. I told her it’s an all expenses paid trip I want to give her but I don’t cover her shopping sprees! =P she’s really looking forward to it too, as she shared it during one of her presentation in her class.

Action:

- start buying tickets early to get them cheap.

- Start researching and finding out more details of the places.

- Save more!!

3. Personal Bests & Races

5km – we have plans to go for the mr25 time trial and I really hope I can qualify. I know I’ve never been a fast twitch runner to begin with; tricia has never been put next to side with the word “fast”. But for a change, I really hope I can say I’m a mr25 runner. Perhaps in my little myopic world, it is my short term goal to achieve that name for myself. I’ve been doing my hills and speedwork, in hope to one day complete that 5km in macritchie under 25mins.

Marathons – tall call but I hope to shave off more time off my current marathon timing. Give me a few more years and my mid term goal is to go under 4 hours.

Not expecting any personal bests in tri but just want to get back into action with my biking and swimming to be in a decent shape to attempt the A’farmosa, PD and desaru tri.

Ultra marathons – my goal is to beat 7laps to go for 8laps in this year’s mr25 ultra. I’ll not be doing the sundown even though that’ll be a good spring board to give me a gauge on how it’ll feel running 80km non stop. Nonetheless, I’ll be doing the north face 50km off road so that’ll be the 2 ultras for 2008.

Adventure racing – not main focus for this year per say. It’ll be more for the thrill and fun rather than aiming to do that well. Reason being ar has too many disciplines we seldom get to train on – kayaking, ascending, mountain biking. There are too many things to do hence ar has to take a back seat. However, if eco-extreme is on, we’ll be there. In addition, we’ll be game for some local races like ace adventure, which was a lot of fun last year apart from the double jumma.

In short, yr 2008 our major races: marathons (phuket, Melbourne, standchart), ultras (north face, mr25), tri (a’farmosa, pd, desaru), ar (eco-x if there is and some local short races).

Actions:

- continue to do speed and hill training religiously. Chase dearie on run if necessar

- Ramp up mileage with ample runway for major races

- Run more at macritchie. Train as at race day condition.

- Bike at least twice a week: Sunday morning + 1day on trainer

- Swim at least twice a week: got to start my interval swim training I don’t fancy. But what to do..must get faster so must work harder.

- Find time to do LSD, probably on Saturdays. Run to rl maybe?

4. Health and Fat Loss

I want to be in good health, lose more fats and gain more lean muscles. I think weight is not a good representative of health. Therefore my goal is to be more lean and lose more fats.

Action:

- be more controlled with my junk food intake (up till this point in time still quite hard to curb).

- Do more gym. On top of swim, run, bike, I’m going to include 1 session of gym work per week. I need to build my core strength as well.

5. Work

I’m not that ambitious but if given an opportunity I would want to be daring enough to take the challenge. i hope to do well enough to deserve more performance bonus. Show me the money!! –chuckles-

Everyday in itself is dynamic. We choose to welcome the challenge or shrink off in denial. I choose the former. May the above not be a wish but become reality. Let’s race the year and complete it well. At year end, let’s review and take stock..we shall see how we’ve fared.

Off we go!

caught in translation

I feel so caught.. caught in translation.

Attempt to sell Tania seemed unsuccessful up to this point in time. There seems to be many people trying to sell off their bikes and the market isn’t that active as it’s not near to the tri season. Often when osim or some tri events draw near, people start scrambling to get a bike, which is silly because if you want to attempt a tri, you should have started biking long before the race and not last minute.

Another factor that’s making my bike hard to sell – it’s caught in the middle. Newbies would not want to splurge $2k on a bike, usually going for something within the $1k budget. People into the sport, given most of them with deep pockets, would lavishly spend to get the best parts. Mine’s a middle class. It uses ultegra parts, second from the top dura-ace. It’s a alu-carbon frame, second to full carbon frames but better than full alu.

I hope to sell it off so I can provide for the new 650c training wheelset but I’m reluctant to let it go at a dirt cheap price because I maintained it to retain its good condition. I really don’t want to fall into desperation to let it go, in any case, keeping it might yield some purpose in return.

I can use it for the trainer, because we won’t want to run our other bikes on it. I can still use it some times because it’s a sturdy little baby.

However, if I so decide to keep it, then the next question is if I’ll buy a training wheelset for neon. If I do so, it’ll set me back by a good $470 ($330 for wheelset, $60 for cassette, $10 tubes, $70 tires). Gulps. Hence, if I don’t sell Tania, would I decide to bite the bullet for this?

Sigh.

I’m so caught. So so so caught.

Someone from malaysia’s bicyclebuysell enquired. I’m really dropping my price like mad.. arranging to view is another big issue because he’s located in KL. I’m really not keen to plan a meet up, go through the trouble of bringing it back to Segamat if it’s not a definite deal. I can save a lot more trouble if it’s sold to someone here locally.

I don’t know what to do now. sell? Don’t sell? Buy new wheelset? Don’t buy?

I want to start training on the trainer now I don’t even know if I should use Tania on it or not.

Argh. Someone nice, won’t you just pick Tania and save us all from being so caught in translation? Pretty please? =(

the wants and must dos

Some things I want and must do:

1. despite being an accounts exec, I don’t keep a budget for myself. Usually I give myself a gauge by looking at my savings balance and that’s where I tell myself how much I can spend or not. Perhaps for better planning purposes, I shall adopt dearie’s suggestion of keeping track of my expenses. I’ll kick that off in feb 08.

2. after the bike ride on Sunday, I realize how much I have slacked off in biking for the past half a year. I couldn’t even keep up with an uncle on a dahon foldable bike. It’s a disgrace! Hence I do have to buck up if I am going to go for any of the tri races in Malaysia come later part of the year. I’m tossing with the idea of training on my trainer on some mornings, that’s the best way to get a good bike workout without having to weave through traffic.

3. sell off my road bike. After much consideration, I’m going to let go of my Tania (my orbea vitesse). Dearie reasoned with me on why am I keeping neon (my cervelo) like a white elephant; spending so much on it but not using it. I always gave the reason that it’s too expensive to run on the road for training, so I’ve always kept Tania for training despite it being a little big for me. time to let it go and I’m really hoping I can sell it off at a decent price. Bad thing now it’s not tri season as yet so there might not be a demand. Nonetheless if I can sell it off, then I can finance a new 650 wheelset for neon to be used for training. The hed will be kept for racing. So, keeping my fingers crossed, I hope to find a good owner for tania.

4. get my wisdom teeth removed. After enduring 2years of wearing the tormentous braces, those idiotic wisdom teeth pushed my row of straight pearlies all out of place. Grr!!! I’m so angry to see all my nice pearlies messed up because of those “wisdom” teeth growing inwardly. Not very “smart” teeth to begin with. I’m really hoping to get them removed before cny when we’re back in Malaysia. To get it done in Singapore in crazy expensive. On the average it’s about $500/tooth. my eyes nearly rolled off their socket upon seeing such a price tag on removal of teeth.

shabby dog with a big nose

There seems to be a lot of hush-hush whispering going on these days. It makes me curious to what is going on but I’ve been suppressing my natural woman’s instinct as a nosey parker.

She seemed pretty disturbed and upset since the week began, when we saw her sitted in boss’ office in conversation. Not too sure how are things working out on her side.. boss doesn’t look like he’s in his best of moods either.

Big nosed tricia has been itching to find someone in the department to bounce thoughts with but can’t seem to find someone trustworthy to share. Hence I always go back to dearie, whom often advise me to stay neutral. I certainly do agree that’s the best stance to take as well.

So much for all the undercurrents in the department..

Work is getting more these days.. somehow the urge of going on for more studies is extinguished by the daily grail at work. Somehow the uncertainty that clouds our department makes my path ahead a little hazy. With the moving on and up of the colleagues around me, I can only hope the haze clears up so that I can better plan my own future ahead.

Alongside with each passing of day, I am looking more and more like a doggie. My hair has outgrown its initial proportion and now I find myself resembling a shabby dog, with its fringe covering my eyes and puffed up doddles by my ears. Yikes! Nancy to the rescue! I’ve made an appointment with nancy to give my tresses a trim.

Work hours at rl has been cut by an average of 3hours per week. it’s disturbing to find the figures on my cheque getting smaller. However, optimistically, it’s a good thing to get to return back home earlier to rest.

Nowadays I’ve been scheduled to finish at 7pm on both sun and sat - that means sat I can rest earlier in order to bike on sun morning. On sun I get to rest early for getting back to office on mon. in light of that, a diminishing figure on the pay cheque is well worth.

Afterall, my livelihood does not fall on rl but my full time job. That’s the aspect in my life I have to give 100% and make something out of. Running is a passion and sometimes an elusive way for me to get away from reality. On the list of priorities the part time job would probably come in with less importance. It’s a good-to-have; not a must-have.

I can’t wear shorts and t-shirt all my life. I want to belong to the world of power suits and stilettos. Oh look! Shabby dog in a suit! - chuckles

one handful of true friends

I think leading your days finding fulfillment in the things you do is important. Somehow I’ve been sensing tension suspending over the workstation diagonally across where I am. Perhaps it’s pay related, like always. Perhaps it’s promotion related. Perhaps it’s just the ego making things hard to swallow.

I hope her requests would be heard and something would be done for her. if any case if it doesn’t work out, I hope she’ll move on and find something that’ll suit her better. It’s definitely better than hanging on here, feeling all miserable and short changed. Learning to leap over the fence takes courage and by doing so, sometimes we do find a pasture that’s greener than the present.

The boat which holds our department should be experiencing a little commotion coming its way. Keeping the morale of the department staff high is important. Despite changes, it’s important everyone else hold fast to their positions and not let the changes bowl us off our feet. If everyone is rooted well, there won’t be much an impact. However, if everyone is built on sand, then be ready for some damage. In any case, the boss must do some damage control and after disaster work. So let’s keep observing and see how things would progress into.

Meantime, I know it’s important I stay as neutral as possible. I’m not paid to poke my head into the business of other people. If they do share with me I’ll just listen and not comment. It’s their own lives, I can’t offer much but a listening ear. Moreover, to avoid people quoting me off the things I say, keeping quiet is the best policy. God gave us 2 ears but only 1 mouth. Isn’t it a clear sign that He wants us to listen more than we talk?

God gave me 10 fingers. It’s a sign that He wants me to express my laments and thoughts in writing rather than tell people around me. because these days, there are not many people I can truly trust.

How many is not many?

Let’s just say only one handful.

dearie's new school shoes

guess wat? even my dearie has a new baby. i call it his new school shoes.

and yea, it's on 46% discount too!

that calls for another "WOW WEEEE JUNIOR JUICE" cheer!

new reason to run..even more!

i could not resist the 46% discount on this baby. it is now clearing at 40% on top of that with the print out i get an additional 10% off. that's 46% off it's original price.

wow wee junior juice! it's like 11% more discount from what i can get it on STAFF DISCOUNT. what?!!

GRAB IT! =)

life in bobian

After working through the account of RPR for 1 whole day to close off 2007, my boss sprung on me and told me he wants everything zerorised. He wants to start the accounts all over again so the transactions between the BVI and Singapore company would be concealed.

I was dumbfounded but I kept my cool to nod in acknowledgement to the tall order. If I could express in words, how I felt that very moment, it would probably be, “ WA LAOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO…”(a real long one), followed with a sigh (hai..)

After dealing with the shock, I know come to the stage of resignation.

“Bo bian. Boss is boss. Boss say what, must sayyy yesss.”

Before I can redo everything I’ve done for the entire year, I’ve got to wait for the IT dept to retrieve the “tape” which they backed up their files into. Wait for the restoration, then redo. I foresee staying late to finish work next week.

WAAAAAAAAAA LAOOOOOOOOOO..life in bobian. = (

study-eat-train-& dun grow fat

I processed through what my boss evaluated with me on 31st December during the appraisal. His affirmation encouraged me greatly and I sensed his prompting for me to do a marketing course again. He said doing a marketing course would give good insight of what it means to run a business, an additional facet that sometimes an accountant fail to perceive. His faith in me to do great things made me nod in understanding that if I would be willing to think out of the box, there are many options ahead of me to explore.

I’m jostling with the idea of taking up a short part time marketing course to enrich myself. However, coming to the financing portion of the course, I wonder if the company would send me for it under its training budget and at the same time with SDF funding. Prior to approaching the respective heads for approval, it’s my responsibility meantime to source and decide on a good course to take up.

Dearie and I hit the gym yesterday, after quite a long break from it. Both of us agreed that incorporating gym work into our training programme will definitely be beneficial. Hence we’ve decided to set aside Friday evening solely for gym work.

In addition, we’re really looking forward to start biking again. I bought for myself a discounted discount cycling top from rl on Sunday. I’m determined to get back into the biking action!! The spirit is willing, just the flesh is weak. Ha!

Work has been quite a heady brew as we prepare to close the financial year. I’m happy to be busy with closing, because it’s doing something within my grasp, instead of grappling with something I cannot seem to put my finger on.

I wolfed down 12 biscuits today. Small they might be but I know how deadly they can be! Gee, I can’t help it, my tummy was growling badly..and I had to pacify it. alrights, I will bring 2 more green apples to work tomorrow so that I won’t have to feel all that guilt.

And of course, training is back in motion. For off season training, dearie and I will be focusing on building strength as well as cross training. No urgency to clock a lot of mileage, but I’ll be focusing more of getting the most of my runs. Let’s see how I fare with that endeavour.

Study, eat, train and try hard not to grow fat – that sums up my blog entry for today. =)

pain in the neck

One kind of person I cannot stand is those who are constantly looking for weaker ones to trample upon so as to alleviate themselves onto the pedestal.

Encountering one early this morning got me really irritated. If you are fast, so be it. I don’t need your kind of advice to go faster. I run because I love doing so, not because I want to use that result to go around telling others you should come join my kind of training to be like me.

I got to speak to eng huat for a while just now and I could sense the same kind of sian-ess that lingers in his voice. I identify the sian-ess in myself too. Sad but true, working at rl is no longer like the former days. Gone are its glorious days.

i suffered a bad headache on Wednesday. Not sure the cause of it but the bouts of pain paralysed me. I took the morning off to see a doctor and then went home to rest after which.

Work’s starting to get more challenging with my sup hounding down my back for the consol which I can’t seem to understand. I need more motivation in this.

Don’t despair, tricia. Hold your head up and keep going. I’m not good but I will get better. Hang on. Hang on. And don’t give up.

the road ahead

the adrenaline of crossing the finish line, the pain of holding through, feeling the kilos burn off with every step.. with all that running brings, it leaves me a different person. i can't wait to put on my running shoes, dress up in my shorts & singlet..let's take the road again. it's time to start running. no excuses, just us and the road ahead.

our new toy!

look at this baby! this is the new toy dearie has bought. he is letting me bring it around and snap photos.

what a wonderful new year present! thank you dearie!