training high

Pretty satisfied with training progress this week. yesterday’s tempo run was the most trying as I’ve pushed myself pretty hard on wed’s 400m sets and Tuesday I’ve also put in at least 90% effort in the 10km run. My legs were pretty sore yesterday when I headed out to meet dearie at the stadium. Nonetheless, as I visualized dearie there at the stadium, waiting for me to come, and I know he’ll run with me through the sets, that kept my legs going. When I got there, I still tried my best to push at least 80% in my 3 tempo sets. 10mins – 2 mins recovery, 5mins – 1 min recovery and the last set, 10mins – 2 mins recovery again. I managed to finish 4 ½ laps for the 1st set and averaged out the same to complete almost 2 ½ laps in the 2nd set. I only managed 4 laps in the last set but I’m glad overall I did 11laps in the 25mins. I added another 2.4km at recovery pace to close the night’s training, adding to the 3km to get to the stadium, I totaled almost 10km. (average pace is about 13min 35s for 2.4km)

Although I was dead beat when I finally got home, it was really satisfying when I reviewed my log and saw 33km in 3 days consecutively. It’s a small achievement for me. dearie commented that my training method was wrong as I should not be running hard for all 3 days, and I do not deny it’s not the optimal way as well. However, given the time constraint, it ended in this awry way this week. I shouldn’t have pushed on wed but I wanted to add some fun into running on the track. It can get really boring just running loops in the stadium, so the interval 400m really helped me get my mind off just counting 1-25laps..instead I could just concentrate on sets of 400m sprints and recovery..

We both had whey after dinner yesterday and I feel it helps tremendously in recovery. My legs aren’t aching at all and I'm all ready to take on gym training tonight! I would want to clock another 6-7km on the treadmill and elliptical machines but usually these machines take a long time. I only have 1.5hrs so I’ve got to utilize every minute wisely. Why 1.5hrs? because parking is expensive. 50cents for every 0.5hrs so we’re paying $1.50 just to park the car there to do gym! There’s no cheaper alternative as we both like the jurong west gym. Cck gym has limited machines and i don’t think I’ll want to pay $2.50 to go to a sparsely equipped gym.

Dearie will teach me some good methods to train my abs tonight. I can’t wait to get some washboard abs! =P

I’ll give real run a miss for some reasons. 1. RL hasn’t managed to get dearie a slot despite we’ve submitted our names to both RLF and RLN. 2. it’s too inconvenient to get to changi and out from changi to RLF on time to start work at 11am. They’ll be closing the road till 10am..and they are only providing shuttle buses from 10am. I can imagine throngs of people struggling to get onto the bus and the crazy congestion which is most likely to occur. If I’m not working, probably I’ll just waste half a day there.. but I’ve got part time work so that’ll be too rush.

Instead, if I don’t oversleep, I’ll do a 25km run down to RLF. That’ll make up really good mileage for the 35km progressive run next week. probably it’ll be the best gauge to see if I should go for the 35km run in the first place. =)

So much for the training updates. Tomorrow will be mike’s big day. Mike’s my cousin who’s into outdoor adventure. Dearie will be helping mummy with the noon catering (thank you dearie!!). while I’ve got to be at RLN for meeting at 9am. (booo!) I’ll finish RLF at 6pm then rush off to mum’s shop to get ready for the dinner at 730pm. I think I’m in good fitness physique so there’ll be no reason for my relatives to pinch my fats and comment I’ve put on weight again.

I’ll remember to bring the dslr so I can snap photos with dearie and mummy. Last week we brought the dslr but left it in the boot, only realized at the dinner table that we had forgotten about it. If only we had a compact camera!!! (Argh!) I was telling dearie if the camera was small enough to go into my bag then we won’t have forgotten about it. =( sigh. It’s ok, I hope we both save enough to get the Olympus so we would have a camera with us all the time! yay!

Haha I’m still on a training high. All the way for dearie and I! all the way till the ultra in dec! that’s the big race for the year! 70km for dearie, 60km for me? gambatte!

staying strong

City rat is sick. I hope he gets well soon. Please stay strong, things will definitely get better.

I couldn’t push myself to finish the entire 1.5km swim on sat. I gave up after 750m but I ran the 10km anyways. Enjoyed the run, but it was the swim I couldn’t stand.

After the bi, raving up my engine to continue training seems arduous. I need to clock good mileage for the upcoming runs. Have to do it, have to do it! Hope the weather holds though, it’s been raining pretty often these days.

I’ve gone down to get submit my application forms for the course. It’ll take 4 weeks before the university would get back to me. Meantime, I’m crossing my fingers, hoping for the best. I do hope I’ll get into the programme!

We’ve all got to stay strong..and get stronger. When the going gets tough, the tough gets going. When the going gets rough, the rough will make us stronger.

journey on

It has been an itch, an urge rather, that’s been nagging for far too long. One I cannot deny its presence, one that I must do something about.

It used to be IM IM IM..all I ever wanted to achieve in my life was to complete the IM. Then one day, I had an accident on the trail and that turned my life around.

It used to be I just want to work and be merry about it. Pay wasn’t important. Wasting my qualification? Who cared. Until one day, reality struck me. Is pay really not that important in this mercenary world? Can I still be merry when I’m paid like an A level student and made to fold flyers all the time?

I woke up and told myself I will waste no more time. I must save and build a future of concrete and bricks. No more “I can live on air” ideology.

CT gave me a push today and told me to grasp onto my life and make something out of it. Rather spending 3 years plodding and come out of it still aimless, why not invest 30k, 2-3 years and come out of it sure about my life and finding direction of what I really want to do.

There are a lot of roads that lead to rome. And different locations require us to take different routes. In my case, I know I must study, just that I’ve been procrastinating for far too long, scrutinized at all the advices i've gathered along. Too many perspectives, too much wisdom, every one simply made so much sense from their own context. None is wrong, all had their wisdom and their advices came from their experience in life. Just that as I gathered more, the more clouded my thoughts become; all of a sudden, I’m really not sure what I want nor could I see where I wanted to head towards.

CT told me to be sure of what I want and go for it. Procrastination doesn’t kill but it brings regret some times. I was really fearful of putting my foot out to the wrong step and end up walking another 2-3years of wasted journey. Nonetheless, if I never stepped out, I would be standing on the same spot for the next 2-3years. The journey out would not be a waste if I knew how to chart my way, looking at the compass, to ensure I reach my destination.

And yes, the journey will begin in Jan 2008. I am looking forward to it, notwithstanding the rants that’ll definitely come along too. Haha. No pain, no gain.

shopping and chocolates

Tuition is really no easy job. The decision to give up on the assignment didn’t come easy but weighing what I had to juggle at present and whether an add-on would jeopardize whatever is in equilibrium right now, I think I made a rational decision.

Mean time, I’ll just stick to RL as it’s still a stable job to hold, though sometimes agonizing when the CD player is down. Yawns!

This working week is slightly shortened by half a day on Friday and I’m taking Saturday off from RL as well just to take a break to get some quality training with dearie. after which i reckon we'll laze on the couch and catch a well-deserved show on dvd.

Sunday I’ll be working full but Monday is an off-day for my company. Monday will be spent with my mum as she has wanted to go shopping for a long while. Spending time with her is always a joy just that the shopping part I don’t really enjoy. I hate the feeling of seeing something I like but yet can’t bear to part with the money to buy it. Most of the time I just try to focus on finding pretty things to fit my mum and not think about myself..because once I get sucked into the vain mood, I’ll start to spend like my mum. Going shopping is like opening a Pandora box and exposing myself to all the possible temptations around. Sometimes my mum would even offer to pay for me, which is the last thing I want to happen. Although I’m financially capable of affording things, it's a choice that I would like to save up the money for rainy days than splurge on merely “wants”. There can never be an end to the things we want, so distinguishing between wants and needs is important.

I’m pretty happy with the progress I’ve been making in training. My body is slowly adjusting to the intensity and I need to gradually hit more targets. Perhaps if I do meet my targets, I might just purchase the new running shoes for myself! =) even pets need reward, lest humans!

Ho ho ho..i’ll still get to do the NIE bi, now that the assignment is off. I’m making sure I don’t come in last..brick training! And more brick training!

I need to find out how to recover faster from training as I find myself wearing out before the weekend approaches. It seems that 1 day of rest is not helping much.

Events coming up

20 oct – nie bi
29 oct – nb real run
4 nov – 35km progressive run (gulps!)
11 nov – trailblazers
2 dec – standchart mara
30 dec – ultramara


ah..u know what makes training hard worth it? sinking my teeth into yummy chocolate of which half is shared with my dearie!

run, liberated

To me, running is a liberating thing to do. It forces me to set time aside to be in touch with myself. It gives me a chance to take a breather from the vexes of daily life and the endorphins eases stress better than a glass of liquor. Liquor drowns, but running liberates.

I feel there’s nothing to flaunt in running. It’s not about how far or how fast you can run, but we should take pride that we belong to the category of humans who understand the beauty of running.

Sometimes running becomes a way to stay in shape and burn off some excess flab but I realize that becomes carnal. When I run because I want to run, I come back from it feeling refreshed in my mind and in my body.

Last Sunday evening, I was off from work late as I had to stay half an hour late. I finished work feeling totally lethargic. I just wanted to sit down, or lie down..or just do nothing. However, dearie reminded me about my plan to do a riverside run that evening, which I was promising to do earlier in the morning. My body was reluctant to move but my mind could use with a run. I got up quickly and changed up, tapping on the inertia my mind gave to my body. We ran from mum’s shop at south bridge road down along Singapore river then to lavender mrt and the looped back via bugis. We got to Singapore river and then ran down to kim seng before returning. It took us exactly 1 hour to complete the loop. As I ran along, I felt much better and the lethargy went away.. it was only close to the end when I felt tiredness in my legs creep back in again.

Like icing to a lovely cake, dearie and I shared a block of ritter sport chocolate and that made the run complete. Happy run topped with a happy food – chocolate. Match made in heaven!

“Running is the classical road to self-consciousness, self-awareness and self-reliance. Independence is the outstanding characteristic of the runner. He learns the harsh reality of his physical and mental limitations when he runs. He learns that personal commitment, sacrifice and determination are his only means to betterment. Runners only get promoted through self-conquest." Noel Carroll, Irish track trailblazer

Macritchie Trail Relay 4x5km

We’re organizing a Macritchie Trail Relay 4x5km this Saturday, 6 October 2007. Click on poster for more details. It’s a fun run, no registration fee required, no prize, no drinks and no food! J

sudoku-wrecked!

i solved a 5+ rated(most difficult) sudoku puzzle!! it's been a long while since i last did it. i can't remember when i actually did solve one! hahaha ..it was a "shared" effort in some sense. vincent saw my puzzle and scribbled in 3-4 of the numbers..but i did the REST of it on MY OWN! the final part was abit tikam-tikam..but who cares! so long i solve it I'M THE KING! Woohoooo!

p.s: note the paper abit crumpled..you know la..sometimes solving sudoku can get a little..frustrating.

i want to run

I wish I’m out there running this minute. Just a mere 1hour and 30minutes to go before I leave my workstation behind for the weekends but my heart is already aching to leave my seat this very moment.

The detox plan has worked pretty well for me. The rumbling of my tummy can sometimes feel uncomfortable but the relief of passing the rubbish out is worth it. The little bottle of maple syrup has almost been depleted and perhaps my body doesn’t need such purging any more. Nonetheless I really like the feeling of having a flat tummy and the excretion of waste regularly.

The weather looks beautiful for a swim and run. Let me out. Smell the wind. Break a sweat. I want to feel as beautiful as the weather.

the look that hurt my flabby soul

I walked into a shop at square 2 yesterday to purchase a black top. It’s meant to match my blue skirt that I’ll be wearing for Mike’s wedding next month. All was fine till I was about to make payment, the sales lady (could be lady boss) of the shop asked if I wanted to try the top before buying it. As I was perspiring quite abit after my short 3km jog (which I usually do before the actual velocity run), I replied it’s ok as I won’t want to dirty their garments.

The sales lady then repeated the question sacarstically, “ you sure you don’t want to try first?” and then ran her eyes up and down my physique, seemingly to tell me I would probably NOT fit her clothes. I said it’s ok and asked if the top is very small that I won’t be able to fit. The other sales lady serving me said..should be ok as I’m not THAT fat. I quickly made payment and walked out of the shop, feeling despondent that being in my size won’t be able to fit into something that’s FREE size.

There’s still some bitter after taste of the incident in me right now..and perhaps that’s the straw that I need to enable myself to hold through a proper diet and training programme so that I will “unveil” the slim-o-me cladded under the multi layered flabs.

I’ve got 2 weddings to attend over 2 weekends in October and I certainly hope to be in good shape. Malaysian cousins are the ones whom I usually pale in comparison with, somehow they have the eat-and-not-grow-fat genes in them and their complexion is really good. I’m envious in many ways but I’m also learning that I own things they do not too. Hence, nothing to envy about, just got to learn to be contented.

I must do a good job with the makeup. Get some nice accessories to match my dresses. I must outshine the rest! :)

lean princess, one day

Waking up on a Monday morning is one of the toughest things to do in life. The first thought that comes to mind is, “what? It’s Monday already? Awwww man!”

I had an eventful weekend, spent with my dearie and mummy. Mummy signed me up for a makeover on Saturday and we then mad-rushed to Esplanade for the Chinese orchestra performance. The makeover made me look at myself in the mirror and feel pretty; I wished I looked like that everyday. However, I do recognize it isn’t necessary for me to doll up to that extent on a daily basis. Nevertheless, the Japanese makeup artist(Hirai) and nerdy photographer made me look and feel like a star for a day.

The performance was not too bad, considering all 3 of us did not fall asleep nor decide to let hunger drive us out of the concert hall early during the performance. It had been quite a while since I last attended a performance with my mummy and definitely a first arty-farty event dearie and I are attending together as well.

Raves about the makeover: I got to pick the colour I want and I chose PINK! The make up artist was saying it’s really KAWAII NE! laughs! He did the make up so naturally yet so sweet; I simply loved it. The lady who did the hair made my hair “fly”. Though she looked like she was having fun making a mess out of my hair, the mess does look really stylish. The photo shot came out pretty nice..and I just feel pampered and a little more confident of myself. I secretly wished I was much slimmer; I would probably have worn a sexy tube top and flaunted my slim arms and back. But knowing I’m not of that physique, I hid my tires and flab in the big black shirt bought at ebase during a sale 2 years ago.

Deep within me I really yearn to be slimmer and of course the ultimate goal of being LEAN.. but it feels like a insurmountable endeavour. And the worse thing for me these days is finding the motivation to do something about it hard. I do need a push-off to get my engine started to do something.

I shared with dearie that having lost nearly 4kgs on medication and training made me feel fabulous. I loved to see my arms slim and my face sharpen. Overall, I still managed to keep 1-2kgs of what I lost off thus far but i’m often so tempted to start medication again so that I can regain what I once had. Training is just one component to weight loss; diet still plays a big part. I miss being 46kgs. I was so so so close to hitting my target of 45kgs! The lowest I’ve been so far is 43kgs and that was surviving on 1 scone and water everyday. It wasn’t exactly the most pleasant thing to do..and probably only do-able for students on holiday with nothing better to do. (I did this crazy diet during my holidays after A levels)

It’s ok. My chance starts again today. Everyday I’m given a chance to try being lean. It’s a life long pursue. Keep trying, keep going. One day I will succeed to become a lean princess. One day.

p.s: dearie is going to say he’s tired of listening to me say the same o’things every day. But I really can’t help it coz this is something rooted in me. = (

little snaps in my pocket

Have I told you about the new camera dearie and I have been ogling at? Tadah!! It’s the Olympus 790 sw. What attracted us is its waterproof and shockproof functions which is perfect for our trips and races. I miss having a camera to bring around. My Nikon has been given to my dad. The second hand Minolta failed me miserably. The DSLR is too much a monster to fit into my bag. Meantime, my sony ericsson handphone has been doubling up as a camera..but if finances permit, I would certainly hope to get one I can bring around. I wonder how does the Olympus fit? Maybe it might just be the one i need. Gee, why must these little cameras cost soooo much? time to look out for lucky draws that give out digital cameras as prizes. What’s better? Strike enough 4D to buy one! (ahhh..i can feel a premonition coming.. ooooo..)

my prince with his red Honda

my prince with Red Honda, as promised

Prince in red Honda

Several times last night I kept waking up. Thank goodness I could exercise self discipline and NOT walk out to the kitchen for a bite. It’s all in the mind, indeed. Had a nice breakfast of cereals (Nestle Fitnese bought by dearie). it’s nice eating breakfast guilt-free.. if I have munched through the night, I’ll probably wake up feeling lousy and angry about myself.

Tomorrow’s the annual dinner for outdoor venture. I’ll be able to reach rtc at 6pm..so I’ve got almost 1 hour of idle time, not knowing what to do. rtc is smack in the middle of no where, no shopping malls, no running tracks. Sheesh!

Got to do my long run tomorrow morning as I foresee myself eating quite a fair bit at the annual dinner. o_O

I realized that the person closest to me sometimes is like a mirror to me - one which shows me my own blind spots. Today dearie reminded me something important – not to be distracted by too many things. I have a tendency to be overly keen to try new things. like a child running through the isles of Toys R us with an empty cart eager to throw lots of toys into it... like a glutton trying to fill his plate at a buffet to get every cent worth; I sometimes pile up way too much. He made me realize that we only have this limited amount of time, having commitments and priorities, we can’t always do ALL the things we want to. I agree to it fully and somehow, that gentle knock on my head straightened my little-child syndrome.

He’s not just a mirror to me, he’s also a team mate to me. when I’m on the verge of throwing in the towel, he is the one who would tell me to press on. He would hold my hand and lead me to continue the race. He’s a training buddy to me – slows down to be at pace with me and sings to me when the road ahead seems never ending. (I call him backside boy since he sings tunes from the backstreet boys pretty often). He’s a cuddle bear to me – providing a hug that warms my heart. He doesn’t mind me wetting his shirt with tears and would call me silly gal when I cry. He’s a guinea pig to me – tasting all the weird recipes I come up with..and not minding rice that gooey like mashed potatoes. =P he’s a lot more which words cannot represent nor anything can replace.. he’s Billy – my dearie, my prince in red Honda. (in the photo, red running singlet :) )

Addendum:

I have a photo of him with his red Honda, I promise I’ll post that up soon!

And yea.. my update on the survival of the $1? I only managed 1 day…coz I had to swipe nets to get some first day supplies soon after.

The hands of a clock runs

Time and tide waits for no man. Ok..confess, how often have you said to yourself or someone around you, “I have no time”. In my case, pretty often. It has become such a habit to say “no time no time”. For this, God is fair. Everyone has 24hours alike, not a minute more, not a second less. So if half the population can have sufficient time to achieve what they set out to do, why can’t I? so, the crux of matter boils down to the prioritization. How important is making time for a run to you? Is spending time with your loved one something you treasure? What are your goals in life? To own a platinum card?

Platinum cards.. I encounter so many of them in my course of part time work. The question to myself is when will I own one too? But so often I retreat back to my stand in life that I will not want to own a credit card because I don’t find a need at this point in time. A debit card serves it purpose well.

I’m working. And I hope I’ll gradually work myself up to achieve better financial independence. Concurrently, I treasure quality time with my loved ones. One thing I regret not doing enough is spending time with my nephew. He’s a lovely toddler and I hope I can grow up with him. I resolve to make time to spend with him weekly. It’ll be sad if my nephew grows up and doesn’t know me in his life.

So, what is worth your time and effort that you would portion a part of your life to include it in? what is it driven by?

On a final note, it’s a pleasant thing to know, reading my blog is worth your time.

ahh...the photo is my lovely nephew and my mummy..=)

Pizza up for running

Last week, I managed to clock 44km of run. Should have done a little more if I had been able to wake up to run to work on Sunday (I am not blaming the rain because it’s more of me than the rain) i totally skipped all the speed training, only managing to do distance running. I pushed hard on Tuesday’s run, thanks to the pizza treat by my boss. From that, i realize my POWERfood for performance is most probably – pizza.

I do have to clock more mileage as the year end run events are fast approaching. Geee! I’ll have to skip interval training on Wednesday as we’re going for outdoor venture’s annual dinner. Interval training is always constrained by the opening hours of the track. Other alternatives must be sought out. The track closes 8.30pm..opens at 6am. If we don’t leave home by 7.15pm to the track, we barely have sufficient time to do intervals. I hate such constraints! Argh!

Been craving for mooncake these days.. dearie and I shared 2 habourcity mooncakes yesterday. Woooo..sinking my teeth into them is absolutely euphoric. But the aftermath of such indulgence is the appearance of blubber which encapsulates my “should have been” slim figure. And since I don’t reside in the arctic, blubber isn’t necessary at all. Thus, the quest to eliminate begins..again.

fat. Often I lament..oh Lord, why can’t I be slim? Or ..why don’t you make all of us slim..then we’ll probably save a lot on gym membership, slimming pills and slimming gels. With absolute childlikeness, I pray hard for a slim figure before I sleep each night, hoping I would wake up with elle macpherson’s figure. To my dismay, each day, I only to wake up next day feeling all disappointed. Oh well, blubber stays. Slim figure, no where to be found. And so the lamenting begins again.

Give me a dial to my metabolic rate.. so I can eat and then quickly burn it off!

Haha. I ought to do something about it. Maybe we should just live on manna. With canola spread please. =P

The Arctic warmed my heart

140907: I watched Arctic Tale with dearie. in my view, it’s a refreshing movie to watch, something that stands out among all the animation and action movies that flood cinemas these days. There were only less than 2 handfuls of people who were with us that evening to catch this movie. Not a highly raved about movie, no big stars, just a movie that brings to us a part of the world seldom seen.. or even a part of the world I might never get to see in my lifetime.. it’s about how this world is experiencing change, because what man is doing in other parts of this globe, somehow affects them in a way more than one. It’s about the cycle of life, as all creatures on earth go through: birth, growth, independence, survival, mating, giving birth and eventually death. And this cycle repeats itself over and over again, whether you are human and animal. According to dearie, the couple who filmed this movie spent 15 years at the arctic to capture all we saw that evening. It was amazing as we wondered how they managed to capture those scenes of blizzard and how they would have traveled along with the polar bear and walrus.

For most young people out there who would run away from a documentary like plague.. asking them to spend $8 on a show with NO Hollywood star is almost a taboo and National Geographic brings a yawn.. but if you’re someone who’ll like a glimpse at how magnificent God has made this world, especially of the Arctic which we do not get to see everyday, please catch this movie.

survival of the $1 coin

News travelled of the commotion somewhere in the heart of the island. I feel disturbed to how sometimes a fear of being displaced can translate into such ugly actions. He’s a nice person, who is flexible and helpful. Doesn’t throw air around and pretty crappy at times. She’s a nice person to work with too, just a recent change of attitude leaves me wondering. Is he really such a threat to her? After some consideration, I do think working with him is a more pleasant than her. the other non-threat guy is more of a easy going, messy-at-times, lad. Nothing impressive of him to make her feel threatened, unlike the former guy, who holds himself well.

Work politics. I think I’ll want to remain neutral and help the first guy as much as possible in order to refrain getting any complaints from her. maybe she’s missing japan guy too much. Messy guy calls it pms.

I don’t like the way she’s behaving. Like dearie said, we’re all here working for a living, why make life so difficult for one another? After all we’re all colleagues.. and she’s not the boss, take it easy la.. work as a team, it’s definitely much better than trying to throw her weights in order to get her way. Haha.. talk about weight, she definitely has a lot more weight to throw around.

Okok..enough of bad mouthing.. I think I like the way my office and my mum’s shop operates. We help each other..and everyone does a little bit.. That speeds things up a lot more.

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While I was fighting to stay awake at work yesterday, I had a sudden craving to lei cha.. an hakka dish which is known to be healthy as it’s makes use of a lot of mint, basil, long beans and tau kwa.

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A question for the day:

Look into your wallet now.. how much cash do you have in it now? I mean cold hard cash in note or coin form?

Are you someone who likes to bring at least $100 around to make sure you can pay for anything that comes up or are you someone who can just survive with less than $10 in your wallet?

Are you someone who would quickly withdraw money from the atm once the ‘reserves’ in your wallet falls below a certain limit? Or are you someone who will deplete all the reserves before reimbursing it with more?

Do you fear having not enough in your wallet? Does it leave you insecure?

I have $16 in my purse right now. Out of that, $15 I’ve got to pay to yanni for the shape run registration later. After which I’ll probably be left with only $1 in my purse.

I’ve gone through 1 week with only $2 in my wallet..and I survived? How did I do that? I took breakfast at home, I brought lunch from home and I’m always home for dinner. With little or no money in my purse, that holds me back from splurging on things I don’t need. This works better if I leave my atm cards at home..but I stopped doing so coz there are really some circumstances which I do need spare cash at hand.

Not having a lot taught me to never take things for granted..and I learnt to use whatever I have sparingly. And dearie taught me to save half of whatever I have and only use the remaining sparingly. So now that I only have $1 in my pocket, I should save $0.50 and only use $0.50. haha.. think about it..what can I possibly get with $0.50 these days?

p.s: stay tuned to my blog if you want to find out how many days I can survive with $1. survival. Outplay, outwit and outlast, with $1.

pig out days

Busy day at work. I tossed and turned in bed, reluctant to wake up.. thankfully dearie was persistent enough to “nag” me awake.. else I’ll probably have to feign sick for the day. –sniggles-

Mondays are the worse days in a week. Because weekends are always fully packed with work and helping out at mum’s, getting up on Mondays can really be quite a challenge.

Guobin has kindly helped us set up our 2 bikes in time for the race. Wow..it’s really a dream riding on my “new” bike yesterday night. The shifting was great, unlike before, which it kept getting jammed. The new frame’s reach for me is also nearer than the frm. We’ve planned to go mandai with our bikes on Wednesday night, after interval training, just to get used to the bikes. Thank you Guobin, for all the help! Really love our black beauties! =)

The north face buy out is taking forever to realize. i’m not pinning any hope on it to be on time for the race.

We’ve decided to go for the genting trailblazer this year again! This time round we’ll be doing climbs as well.. genting has one of the tallest indoor rock wall around this region and we’ll give ourselves a shot at it this coming November.

Work is revving up quite a bit with the budget exercise coming up and board meeting in December, my supervisor has briefed me on my duties coming up. It helps me better brace myself for it.

Weekends are always pig-out days for me. Weekdays is time I am really conscious of what I eat, while weekends, I’ll just eat whatever I want to. I wonder if it’s good..hmm. I had beehoon goring at mum’s, fajar bread for breakfast on Sunday, beehoon on Saturday.. those food are tasty but way too sinful for everyday consumption.

I’m still aiming for that nice sugoi run top and shorts..so as I slowly work myself there..i better keep my diet at check.

1.5hrs to lunch and I’ll be using it to catch some forty winks. Sleepy. Probably with the nap, I’ll be awake enough to do a 7km run and stairs climb later.

Progress in training is good, but there’s a lot of room for improvement.

Honestly, I get really tired of working at rl. Standing around from 11am – 9pm is no joke. Though I’ve been at it for the past 2 years, I find that the only thing that keeps me going is the pay cheque at month end. Other than that, there’s not much to look forward to. Staff benefits are no longer the cream topping on the cake for me.. just for the money’s sake, I must hang on. That extra dollar in the pocket, does make a difference to civilians like me.

run tricia run!

Thursday, another day to Friday. So close to the weekend again.

Planned to do 6 sets of 800m sprints but we managed only 4 sets. Nevertheless, going out 100% for those 4 sets was a good feeling. I set for myself a personal best of 1:56 per 400m lap. It’s been a long time since I last did speedwork.. during my peak, I clocked 12mins for 2.4km. But well, that was eons ago.

I hope to shave off a good 5mins from my marathon pb in the standchart marathon at year end. I hope with all the speed training, it’ll translate to some results. 4:42, that’s the goal.

MR25 ultra.. goal is 5 laps of 10.5km. aim is 6 laps. If I do so, dearie got to buy me a new cw-x sports bra! Hahaa!

Depend on no one but ourselves. It doesn’t seem that my colleague is going to help us in any way with our running, so we must do it on our own. Not everyone is like Johnny and Bimo who would unconditionally help us. I’m not pinning much hope on my colleague. Without him, dearie and I would still strive to do well in the coming races. 3 more planned out for this year – SAFRA Avventura (next Sunday), Standchart Marathon, MR25 Ultra.

Next year we are pending the IM plan for now, though we are raging to go. It’s a 8 months commitment and loads of discipline is required. Money vs dreams, it’s such a hard choice to make. Taking up the IM has its opportunity costs involved. I may have to give up rl because weekends are the best times to do mileage training.. if we are going to train in desaru, it has to be over the weekend as well.

No more mba dream in line, maybe im dream is the next one to pursue!

A random rant: whatever is given is bonus and we shouldn’t expect too much. Scrooges are always afraid of others milking of them. Too bad that he didn’t keep his word. Saying this today and changing it to another the next day only shows how much can we depend on what he promises. Or maybe he would rebut that he never promised anything, so perhaps that means we are not suppose to fully trust on your words as well. If I wanted to stick to pride, I would just turn away and not take the offer. However, since it’s given I’ll just take and leave my rants to my blog and with my dearie. If that’s all is on the table, I’ll sweep it all off, walk away and shrug my shoulders in dismay.

away from the beach

in the last 30mins of work time before i break for the weekend, i decided to change the layout to something minimalistic. the beach babe layout is just so not-me.

as i wrecked my brains on what possible means i can have to do some business online, i suddenly remember how my blog has come to a standstill.

i clicked the link to a popular local blogger and the photos on them told a story of their own. i read another friend's blog and within those lines, his own story too.

i feel cold. my fingers tremble. and my stomach is rumbling. reading someone's life distracts me from all that agony.

birthday, blades & bike

Had an eventful weekend. It was quite a rush back to Segamat on Friday night but it was a trip which was worth every minute of traveling for. Dearie’s family bought a cake and celebrated my birthday with me. It was a nice blueberry chessecake with Oreo base. Yummy!

Listening to dearie’s dad share his opinion on the mba made a lot of sense to me and it made me evaluate and consider areas I did not perceive of. One question he posed struck me, “Are you doing the mba because there’s a need to, or is it just a paper chase?”

True enough, my honest answer is the latter. It’s not easy to make me change my mind once I decide on something.. I’m so close to registering for the course, but his dad made so much sense I could not just blindly believe I am still making a right decision for myself.

Hence, mba plans will adjourn till further notice. Meantime it’s time to gather experience and learn at my job.

Ace adventure was a mix of fun and frustration. Nonetheless, racing with dearie made all the difference. He was the one to push me on when I thought the race was meaningless after tony dropped out. I couldn’t handle the double line ascending which made things worse, but he told me we must still finish the race. In light of other things, I think it was a good race and we made good pace. With further training and more bike sessions, let’s hope we can do better in future races.

Birthday’s over and I’m officially 26. wishes I gathered this year.

dearie
mummy
kai
bimo
Vincent (financial planner)
janson
weiliang
daddy
aiping
guobin
christin
Irene (secretary)
Daniel (msn)
latios (1 of my youth I suddenly forgot his name)
aman

hehe..i realize as years go by, wishes get fewer. People who remember always remember. =)

no 4D win for me but the ang pao I gotten from my dad and bro is sufficient to buy the roller blades. I decided not to buy them after all, will be getting a pair of running shoes instead as I’m totally soaked my phoenix in mud and sea water. I think I run more than I blade, hence shoes over blades.

My mtb is in dire state. I discovered a deep gash on the chain stay which I’ve got no idea when it appeared from. I need to get the shifting fixed as it got jammed several times before and during race.. I couldn’t change it to granny so I had to crank up the slopes on 2-1. It’s crazy! It’s visible that the overall condition of the bike is bad and Patrick suggested I should try to sell the current frame off, salvage whatever parts salvage-able and then buy a frame that fits. Of course that’s ideal but I doubt the frame will be worth anything at this point in time, looking at the condition of it. I can’t bear to spend on a new bike though I know if I want to race on, I need a relatively decent one. My heart’s skewed towards a titanium bike for fuss free maintenance but that comes with a price tag of around 1.5k. The entire set up would probably cost 2-3k. I’m really not willing to spend that kind of money now. Alternatively I love the kinesis frames..but it’s a lot to pay for alu frames. I’ll be crying if I get the nice paint work all scratched up.

Second hand frames that fit my size are very hard to come by. 14” would fit me best but it’s once in a blue moon to find someone sell a mtb that size. That’s also the reason why I ended up with a 15.5” which is too big for good control.

Tricia tricia..u want something good that doesn’t cost you much? Dream on!

OOOoooooOOo..this is the K2 Velocity 4.0 (W)

Birthday Wish 2007

Tomorrow is my birthday.

So far I’ve gotten 2 bday presents: tri suit and crocs from dearie. Vacuum cleaner from mummy. Bro’s giving me a red packet. Dad wants to get me something but I declined. He should save the money up.

I was so near to getting the blades I’ve wanted to get for a long while. Dearie spotted a nice carpark top deck which will be ideal for me to blade around. My eyes sparkled with a tinge of hope when that idea came. I’ve been wanting to get a pair of blades for a long while but didn’t do so coz I found there’s very few places in Singapore to blade and it’s not cheap purchasing and maintaining when (esp when I have 3 bikes to take care of already).

I tried on a pair of K2 velocity 4.0 and it felt really really really nice! I was so close to getting them but I decided not to at the end of it. I asked my mum if I was wasting money and my mum’s reply knocked the decision into me, “ play can anytime play. Don’t waste such money la.” I know dearie had that.. “if u want can get but I’m not supportive of it” look which also made me hesitate.

Then I thought of the studies I want to embark on. Dearie might be right after all, I may not have time to blade once I start studying.

Moreover, I am seriously cash strapped. I shouldn’t waste the money like that. Every penny I have I would like to channel it to my studies.

As I sat in the bus on my way to work today, I was still aching a little over the blade which I was so close to laying my hands on. Then something silly came in mind..if only I struck lottery, hopefully it’ll be enough to cover for my blades.. though I really haven’t got much luck with 4D and lottery. So far I’ve bought 4D twice and I never won a single cent. Tomorrow is my birthday, I wonder if that’ll bring me luck?

“Ma, help me buy 4D hor.”

“What number you want to buy?”

“Anything la. Tomorrow is my birthday, maybe got luck. Then can buy blades liao.”

“Where got anything one? U want must give me a number.”

“Huh..let me go think about it.”

Dearie gave me a 2627 coz I’m 26 years old and he’s 27. not very innovative huh. I thought I might want to get my colleagues help me pick a number, maybe they can share a little of their luck with me.

I feel like a little kid wanting her toy badly. Haha.

I’m not good with numbers? Anyone has anything good to suggest? If I strike, I’ll treat you coffee la.

Therefore, birthday wish for 2007 is to strike enough 4D to buy a pair of blades. No more wishing to be slim coz I know it doesn’t work =P

it's hard

I’ve been eating plain wholemeal bread for the past 2 days. Plain and I mean ko-song, nothing. There’s an unknown wholesomeness in the bread that I never quite noticed when I had them with spreads.

Taming my taste buds is something I am trying to do. I have a tendency to go for food with strong tastes; it’s a real challenge trying to tone down on it.

Attempts to lose weight continue to seem infertile. I am so tempted to resort to unorthodox means but I know it does me no good. Somehow I never can accept the way I look – flabby arms, bulging tummy, thunder legs.. there’s always something to find flaw in. Oh please let me lose a good 5kgs and I’ll be thankful!

Dearie, tony and I will be racing in the coming ace adventure. We’ve only got 1 goal for this race..and we all know what! Haha. Haven’t done adventure races for a long while..it’s good to get into the action again.

Desaru training isn’t looking too good. I might give it a pass than to go there and merely do it for the sake of doing. I want to go to do it at the best I can, not just go through the motion.

Am I being too hard on myself already? Hmm.

how to build a kingdom

for those friends who lead sedentary lives (work, eat, sleep with no exercise), i thought this quote from mind your health today might make you reconsider taking something up for yourselves.

"Exercise is King. Nutrition is Queen. Put them together and you've got a kingdom." - Jack La Lanne

vrooom vrooooooom!!

i passed, i passed and I PASSED.vroooooooooommmm!!! yayyyyyyyyyyy!!!!!

want to pass my bike test too..slowly pick it up and complete it..like mum says..got to finish off what i started..cannot leave things half way..

life's jam packed..work's jam packed..training will soon be jam packed too.

TGIF

Life has been like the busy mrt that scuttles from station to station. Continuous, rapid and somewhat fulfilling – gets me to my destination.

In all the busy-ness of working 7 days a week, with occasional getaways with superboy for runs and races, I actually find myself half smiling in my sleep.

I find myself doing useful work – reports that tell a tale of how a company has been faring. I’ve got hardly time to type my blog at work, unlike my previous jobs that gave me much more flexibility and leeway. I find my time is used productively, as I can walk out of office feeling satisfied with the tasks I have managed to complete for the day.

Being esteemed for the work I do, I am given an opportunity to prove I can do something worth the mention. Unlike rjc which only saw me qualified to fold brochures and saw little of what my background and education can contribute as well.

In all, I’m thankful for God opening each and every door, for every station has to be linked with a track between them.

And where ever I go, I know I have my loved ones with me – superboy, mummy, christin and other friends who keep me going on.

have a good day

took a long hiatus from blogging as i no longer have the luxury of sneaking in to blogger.com to type a short blog every other day in the office. perhaps it's not a bad thing, for that'll probably mean i'm utilising my time in the office to be engaged in more meaningful work.

work has been a challenge on its own. with deadlines to meet and a whole lot new things to learn..i've got to be constantly on my toes. the downside of work is that my eye sight is deteriorating as i've got to stare at the monitors for long hours a day. astigmatism seems to be crawling right back in again. lazy eyes..does it mean i've got to get my glasses on again. sigh.

driving has been fun so far. there's alot of polish up before the actual tp test itself.. i do certainly hope i clear it once and for all.

training has taken a bad seat in my life for now. working out is more for the sake of keeping fats off than for performance at any race. not many race goals for now..just the simple "completion".

my eyes are going blurry now. need to look away. work is starting soon in 15mins.

i hope u have a good day too.

picking life's pieces

it's good to go to work and be really busy every moment. work has been pretty packed since it embarked all over once again. fresh start, new environment, renewed goals.. life's gradually unfolding its next petal.

exchange rates, financial statements.. i'm back to accounting again. the cycle's coming to its full round. i took a part of my life to go explore..now it's back to pursue whatever i last left off.

i haven't felt such mental fatigue in a while. as i pored through the 3 years' of accounts i'm suppose to regenerate its financial reports.. it drained me mentally. 2nd day at work and things are still going pretty smooth. i want to make this job work out. and i will refuse to give up easily.

my skin has been giving me alot of problems. itching badly. i hope it goes off soon. it's agonising.

haven't been training as much as i hope i can.

time to pick up my driving lessons next week. must arrange for it tomorrow.

picking pieces up.

when things hit the rock bottom, they have to bounce up.

work hit a bottom following the decision to leap for a no-pay leave starting monday. but i'm thankful God opened 2 interviews next tuesday. both at tuas, which i'm ok with. let's hope both will go ok.

the flat hunt collided into the murky end when the sums worked out to be a great hefty bit of cash upfront. we really don't have that much on our hands, but both of us are willing to give all we've got. this decision is a huge one..i was even reduced to tears coz i realized how i've foolishly spent my money on things that won't build my future. i learnt my lesson to always save, save, save.

even as my morale plunged coz i really wish i had more to offer and i wish i had not spent so much time in social work which enriched my life but not my pockets, i told myself there's no point dwelling in the past. as i leaned my head upon his shoulders, i knew i must pick myself up. change that negate feeling into strength that'll propel me to find a job that'll earn me more, build my career..progress..invest and study..for these will be what will develop my life.

yes, i do feel poor when i know i might be emptying all i have into a home. but i know there's no point dwelling on the state, fold my arms and do nothing about it. i must break out of this state, and the only way to do it is to work harder and save more. poor people don't have to always remain poor, if they know how to empower themselves to move out of the vicious cycle.

superboy & fighter.. both with such great spirit..how can we not live up to the names we choose to call ourselves by. i love the word fighter..coz it has the never-say-die attitude in it. this is one life situation that such attitude must arise. my attitude will determine my altitude, motivational speakers often say.

the day was on a roller coaster today. with the up of knowing today's my last day and mr c.a. who seemed quite helpeful to get it to come to past. down when he almost blew his top coz i was trying to clarify that i should only be returning half the net pay not the gross. up again when i gotten a call from one other company in tuas for interview on tues.. up again when i finished my cip data entry. and up again when i gotten an interview with safra. however, it dipped just 1min ago when i received an email that 1 out of the 3 interviews has been cancelled coz the position has been filled up. that's fine. still got 2 to be hopeful of. may God open the right door to the right job.

Happy are those who dream dreams and are ready to pay the price to make them come true.
Leon J. Suenes

tricia goes around the money which makes the world go round

false alarm this morning.. thought the school cockpit had some silly need for duplicate entries..anyway, i think things have been cleared! it came to light after i saw the report of a student, who wanted some changes done on her report..so with some track-back..it was a relief i needn't run through the entire box of cip records to get them all keyed in again. phew!!!!!

sneaked out at 2pm to the arcade at raffles place to get my eyebrows trimmed. i came back 15mins late. 315 i set foot into the office. prior to that i received 2 mystery calls from a 6416XXXX number which i decided not to pick up as i was in the mrt. it's too similar to my office num 6419 XXXX. gulps. it's totally alright to use my lunch break to run errands..just that knowing i was going to be 15mins late..that brought apprehension in me to pick up the phone. anyway i'm already back in the office now..so pfft.. -dumps it a side-

the whole flat thing drowned my spirit in a pail of water. somehow it led me to think what have i been doing for the past 5 years of work. i hate myself for deviating out to do social work.. i desperately must get back to finance now.. everything is just quantified in monetary terms..and i need the vitamin M badly. =(

as i saw the panes on the mrt doors reflect tricia, i somehow do think i got a nice physique of one who probably can try passing off as a physical trainer. it led me to think if i could make something of it.. but i guess the process required of me is to do my bec and ft courses.

was pondering a little of how to make a catering business work.

whatever can make money, i want to try.

or perhaps i should take up another job at 7-11 coz the clinic job didn't quite work out. =(

indeed..money makes the world go round.

going no-pay

progress of the cip data entry has been very promising. i've cleared almost 80% of the stack and i'm left with only 20% of the ones which are the tougher ones (longer lists of students on each entry). it's heartening to know i'm well on my way to complete this final task given to me. =)

i was totally left out of the isle programme today..which i didn't bother to ask why. on the brighter side, it's not all a bad thing i'm excluded.. at least i won't have to do another camp for thursday and friday.

a few things on my to-do-list as i go on no-pay leave starting next monday

1. interview at tuas
2. hair cut with patrick
3. get my eyebrows trimmed
4. shopping with my mum
5. catch up on sleep/rest
6. continue to send out lots of applications
7. confirm itinerary for hanoi

friday is coming so close, so close!! =)

my days at rjc are numbered!

super hungry this after noon..ate 1 big pao and a chicken sandwich. super full now!

had a really satisfying dinner with superboy and meow yesterday at thomson. we had: fish hor fun. fish in sweet & sour sauce, spicy potato leaves, ha kows, siew mais..yum yum!!

that was what i call a PROPER meal! after the 12 1/2hrs race in selangor..

totally enjoyed the eco-xtreme race...though it did get really trying at the 20km bike up fraser's hill and the 4hrs up and down trek to the 2 summits. the rafting was fun, the mountain biking portion was great!..abseiling down the 60m bridge was the best i've yet done for all my races..and to top that off..tyrolean traverse across the unpicturesque water fall at gunung chilling..beautiful!! nomad never fails to bring to us good races =)

have been sending out lots of resumes for the past 3 weeks. so far only 1 company has responded but i'm finding difficulties to go down for interview as it's almost impossible to take leave from rj side. sigh. i hope my no-pay leave request goes through, that'll release me to be able to go for interviews starting next week.

mum and superboy have been really supportive in my career move back to finance.. even as i decided to take a leap to go on no-pay leave earlier than my last day.

update at 3:22pm. mel came over and told me my no-pay leave has been approved by the vp. she'll help me settle it. it's really such a burden off me as i've been vexed over the whole matter of whether they'll release me that soon. i guess they do find me a waste of their resources and time, might as well boot me away since i asked for it. but it's good..coz i can finally arrange for the interview at tuas. =)

all of rcel is out for recce at ubin except me. i'm pretty contented in the office doing data entry. at least i know i can go off at 6pm sharp and go for my badminton class at 8pm with no qualms. let's just hope given my last day being friday, i'll be spared from the camp this thurs and fri.

my aim is just to finish the whole box of cip records by friday. i think there is no need for me to attempt to jut my head into what the rest of them are doing, just for the sake of knowing what's going on..and in the process, i get myself into more unnecessary work.

wrapping the day soon..finish a few more entries..then it's badminton time! yay!

eco-xtreme

the next race for superboy and i. happening over the good friday long weekend. wish us luck!

the essence of life

i made a mistake. there are 5 more camps to go. 6 for this month alone. from next thurs onwards, it'll be back to back. 3 out of 5 no venue. 2 out of 5 at dairy farm. i'm filled with much negativity towards camps these days. reasons being:

1. i lose having time outside working hours to do my own things. basically 1st day of camp ends at night. and 2nd day of camp ends around 5pm. latest we've gone to is 11pm for 1st day, 730pm for 2nd day. with that kind of load for 4 out of 5 working days, my energy doesn't get replenished at all.

2. my energy is sapped- both mentally and physically. i've got little energy and drive to train much these days. no wonder none others in rcel are into adventure racing nor any form of endurance sports. i guess they are like me- no energy left.

3. efforts don't always go appreciated, nor is all the work always effective. some classes feel they are already bonded and don't need a short 1.5days camp at all. if they themselves don't see a need, then why do it in the first place? i've yet to see a counsellor going to a client and telling him/her..u need counselling, please come to me now.

the entire feeling is like standing on a piece of thin ice floating in the sea. i can't run from it, i can't choose to jump off from it. filled with dread and reluctance i am made to stand on it till i see land which i can land my feet on.

deep in me, i would like to leap off, plunge into the freezing water if i have to..at least i free myself from the no-choice situation. translate that into my present situation, means i would request to leave mid-month instead of month end. but is that possible? i'm really not too sure though.

i read of the rich and beautiful in urban today and i am filled with a bad concoction of envy and jealousy. i'm envious how some can have such a luxurious life with the world circling around them..jealous how they have so much money to possess whatever they desire, splurging 10k just to dress up for a ball..while i don't even have 10k in my posb savings account. these are just the rich, beautiful and lucky ones existing in the world who probably won't know much of what it means to have the banks tax $2 admin charges on your bank account.

all i'm hoping is to get a decent job..get a decent pay..have time to train for races i enjoy.. spend quality time with my loved ones.. smile everyday and know everything will be ok.

so much things these days come with a price tag on them these days..quantified in monetary terms. i actually do want to dress up more.. get a nice hair colour and hairdo..wear pretty frocks.. enjoy spa.. have facials..but those are luxuries not in my means. i can probably just look from afar and rant.. "i don't think those are for me."

in all the bleakness, living simple isn't all that a bad thing. i'm happy with a small flat. happy just huddle around with superboy in front of the tv, eating dinner. happy just working weekends at running lab with interesting colleagues. at the heart of it all, we all just want love. to love and be loved in return. that's the essence of life. =)

greyish days at rjc

i haven't been exactly too happy at work. how strange things just nose-dive into gloom and dust. not even looking forward for yet another meet up tomorrow. what i have to say i've already said. i doubt they'll want me to stay on, neither do i want to do so.

4 more camps up ahead and 3 of them with no venues. overheard a possibility of ending up at ubin. uh-oh..i've got badminton class on one of the camps.. how am i going to get back ashore, go for class then rush back to camp? i sense a impending disapproval of me going for class again. work is work is work is work, and there is NO compromise to that. i hate camps coz it saps my energy and ruins all own life outside working hours. i have things i want to learn and develop in..

map says we get from pt a to pt b via road c, and that's the way we MUST go. no to road d even if it's faster..NO to road e even if it's flatter. road c it is, road c it must be. such inflexibility affects me tremendously because as my mum requested me to take some off time to spend with her, i could only say i can't. reason is because i'm told i must put in all the hours required of the camp..9am to 11pm..9 am to 6/7pm the next day..and for all that there is no privilege of time off or rest. i think i won't want to voice and ask for me too, in case i'm seen as a trouble maker trying to find flexibility in her system which is rigidly structured as such.

another reason for my departure is the salary which i feel is pathetic. moving back to finance which i can better put my qualifications to use than be literally trampled on coz i don't fit into their mould of how a training facilitator should be. moreover, i don't need their sympathy to TAKE ME IN. those words suck. i'm not a wandering stray that needs a shelter over my head. i want to redeem my esteem n walk away with my head held high.

been terribly left out in alot of work related things since i tendered. i'm trying to not let it affect me..because i didn't choose to be left out..i'm just left out coz i'm soon going to leave. so i guess the rest felt there's no need to involve me too much. oh well..

dw constantly reminds me "the thing is..you are leaving soon." that's really a good thought to focus on, when the lights dim so much it's uncomfortable to be in.

interview at queensway turned out pleasantly nice with doctor wang. wondering what'll be the outcome. would i get it?

i don't know where it will eventually lead me to, but i only want to utilise all the time i have in my hands to earn more. there's alot ahead which requires the cash and i'm lacking much in vitamin M. (m for money)

i know i can survive. i am a gal who can work her way thru to survive. having grown up with little, i can live with little.

sometimes i really want to break down and cry..but what would crying help? at the end of it, i would still have to decide where i want to venture to.. i would have to still stand up and continue in the journey.

1 more day to go before i head to kkb for race. no camps. good thing. i'll probably spend tomorrow doing data entry. a whole box full. got to get it going.

working evenings from 630pm to 9pm at rln for the next 2 days. make up a little for the week ends i'll be missing.

will be making some small tokens for a few nice people i've met at rjc. despite all the unhappiness..there r these handful of nice teachers and colleagues i can truly smile at with no qualms. that's some consolation, isn't it?

silver lining around every dark cloud

eventful weekend which i think i did mediocre for the 2 races which took place.

singapore bi: i think according to the clock i did a 1:51 thereabouts. i thought i did the 10km at a miserably slow speed.. but i kept telling myself i don't want to cheong and leave myself all depleted, jeopardizing the longer run next day. so i just kept to my small little strides at a slow pace. even bernard who was there supporting, asked," why so slow?"

kl marathon: our hotel was situated in the heart of chinatown. got my hands on a few nice bags and card holder. i was trying my best to do a sub-5 but the terrain was comparatively tougher than scsm. kl's route is full of hills..and the last 10km brought us through a long uphill which was part of the 30km pacesetters route. the only thing i could tell myself to do is to keep running and NOT STOP. came in at the time of 5:01 which is 14mins slower than scsm. felt the fatigue kick in much much earlier around the 8km mark, compared to the 15km mark for scsm. water was plentiful with 100plus and water stations.. starting early at 430am was a bonus as well. route was well thought out..at least we didn't have to run to and fro the same place..it was around the outskirts of kl city and then into the heart of the city..back around then back in.. my 1st time doing this route..and next year when i'm back, i promise to be more prepared for it. and of course, doing the bi the day before and then a marathon was a bad idea..haha..no more of that next year! =P

and yes.. MOS SAVED THE DAY!! without MOS, i couldn't have kept running. after 20km mark, it was MOS music that kept my legs going. i just let the pounding of the music fill me entirely..and i told myself i just want to keep moving my legs to the music. i promise this time i'll get myself MOS CDs..to think the 1st ones i ripped were from aaron.. MOS is TRICIA's SOLUTION To MARATHON AGONY!

work is now of fuzzy grey and it's doesn't seem to be making much sense to me. there are things i know i must do and those are in clear light..however, those which are expected of me..and those others perceive of me, that's in the fuzz.

like christin said," if i gives me so much inner conflict, then seriously consider about it." yes, it is causing much inner conflict. and yes, i am seriously considering how helpful it is to me.

meanwhile, in all haziness of things, my consolation is knowing God, superboy and christin will always be by me. mummy is there too! silver lining around every dark cloud i guess. so, tricia, smile. =)

fat blasting and onto hanoi!

a little whimsical episode in my work today..blog it before it gets laughed away into the wind.

teacher j: hey..my class camp how liao? my 5star room ready?

colleagues cm: ya..6 star.

cm: and can see alot of stars at nite too.

teacher j: o_O

teacher j: actually i just need aircon la

me: yea..alot of natural aircon..that u can't turn off.

teacher j: can't turn off? o_O

the day started on a high note in the treble as i "attempted" for the first time to pack lunch for super boy. menu for the day: brown race (pre-fried with shallots and garlic), sardines and boiled broccoli. hope it's edible-licious for superboy's tummy.

after the hustle and bustle, we went for an ez 4km run. enjoyed it as we just chit chatted along..4km went by in a blink of an eye.

reading. just feeding my mind with alot of reading these days. daily Straits Times, Today.. and books.

the excitement for Hanoi trip is slowly raving up. got to settle accommodation soon..and also come up with a probable itinerary for the trip.

plan plan plan..i think that's one thing i caught on from superboy. =)

going to take the bi easy coz i'm simply not prepared for it. worse case just get fished out! =P and marathon for me is a fat burning session..so i'm also going to take it easy.

alrites..back to my papers..sourcing for good places to visit, eat and shop!!

dreams in the building

1st day of mc

outrage of eczema-mama..from the normal joint and neck..now it went up to my right eye. itchy. dry. tearing.

doc at my family clinic was a gem to have, despite the hefty medical bill that came along with all that tenderness. hehe. slept. i slept so much i lost count how many hours i was in slumber.

2nd and final day of mc

fruitful. did quite a bit of the things i've been wanting to do for a long while but never got around doing them

1. write to joyce

2. do laundry

3. iron clothes

4. mop the floor

5. wash the toilets

6. plan the itinerary for hanoi

7. wrap christin's present

8. do my can handicraft

9. read read read

10. do some circuit training

11. cycle

12. plan training a little

13. update this blog (which i am doing right this moment)

bec course is next up. then to the ft course. i am hopeful! things will fall through.

marathon is this weekend. i am in deep shit!

bi? i'm not even 10% ready for it..laughs. cham ah..maybe just be pom pom gal for superboy..or like he said..we'll just go for the sake of doing some open water swim.. hopefully i don't get fished out for non-completion of the swim. ho ho ho..highly likely leh.

i've come to a point of realisation i shouldn't be asking nor expecting too much from my rjc job. just take it as it comes. let my courses be the main focus coz that'll be what might help me int he future. i don't dream big for this position in rj. just my sentiments at this point of time.

okies. mean time..other dreams are still in the building..and worth my time and effort! =) that's gd to know!

life is what we make out of it

it's been a while.. been submerging myself in work and reflecting upon bits and portions of my life.

having this insatiable appetite for learning..reading..enriching myself. have been reading quite abit on s.e.a..history..culture.. right now i'm exploring possible courses i could do. anything from web designing, wilderness first aid..sports training..flower arrangement even.. if those are things worth doing, i will want to learn. of course, often at times like these, main deciding factors would have to be MONEY (first and foremost) then the TIME. if those are non-issues, then rest of it would fall safely in place.

have to compile a list of likely places and courses i can do..weigh them out..sort them in priorities and start to slowly embark on them.

there were bouts of trying moments at work, the struggle was often from within. so glad superboy and christin are always there to hold me through and their affirmation means so much to me. =)

been flipping the classifieds every day. i'm keen to get another part time job. most hopefully a clinic assistant job to fill my nights and earn more for saving.

been really interested in skin care since the workshop in school the other day. burnt a hole in my pocket just to get some of the skin care products i never quite bothered to buy nor apply. things like sunscreen, moisturizer, eye cream.. those are things i scrimp on..often just using whatever my mum has and most often, i just simply skip it altogether. the only things i consistently would do were just wash my face with a cheap facial wash and apply on toner from the same series. over the workshop, i gain some insights into skin care..of which the most impactful statement that still rings in my mind right now "women start to age at the age of 25" o_O uh-ooooooooohhhhhhhhhhh!! i'm a gal often out in the sun...and i never gave too much thoughts about the uv rays that is silently killing my skin. no more of that now..i got to undertake some self-care!! hopefully whatever spent on the products would be worthwhile.

so much for skin care.. i'm also curious to do some make-up too! so much for the tom-boyish tricia..i'm pretty excited to land my hands on a good eye lash curlers and mascara. i wonder if it'll help brighten up my whole look? hmm!! maybe i'll get them when i get my pay.. still very "giam" when i have to spend on make-up..=P or maybe if superboy is reading this..maybe he can consider a sponsorship? (sniggles)

singapore bi..i'm still torn if i should go for it or not.. the organisers made things kinda difficult for us for a moment..with the certs etc.. haven't swam for almost a month i think..i'm really hesitant and fretful about going for an open water swim. will probably do some crawling in the pool later this evening and see how things would work out from there.

marathon's coming..panic! panic! panic!!!!

so much things to do..so much to look forward to..there's is no moment to waste at all! =) in short, life is just what we want to make out of it. yea?

so small to an olympian

tues and i'm still in the sleepy mode. the aftermath since camp lingers on.

tonight i resolve to sleep at 830pm latest!! must get suffice sleep. till 6am tomorrow that'll give me 9.5hrs of sleep. i do need that. hate waking up feel lathargic and wanting to go back to sleep.

dinner would be an easy to go bread i reckon..so that i can get to bed on the dot.

tomorrow, i WILL wake up feeling FRESH!

can't wait for interview on thursday. it'll be the determinant of how i'll plan for my driving lessons. exams are 3months+ away, i do have to pick up my driving lessons soon.

completed all the tasks i set out to do at work today. final task for the day will be the meeting with the rest on the isle programme.

training has been really sluggish this week. haven't done anything as a matter of fact, as i've been feeling worn and tired. got to finish the night with my usual prune juice and multi vits.

hopefully i'll be well enough to do my macrit rounds 'morrow.

got to pick up mileage again..after the ex-olympician customer from germany who came into rl..his pb for 42km is 2:11.. o_O monthly mileage=approx 1000km.weekly mileage=250km!! faints. i'm so so so so so so far from that.

but it's ok..i'll start with whatever i have. hopefully it grows on me. =P

go go monday blues

i'm an OFFICIAL AUNTIE liao!! ho ho ho..my nephew is suppose to call me GU GU..sounds..erm..OLD. bleah.. baby kenneth jr looks super uber CUTE with his RED ROSY cheeks..makes me want to muak muak muak him.. cradled the little babeeee in my arms and i felt this upsurge of joy that came into me.. such a sweet little life.. melted me thoroughly..

as i turned n told super boy, "so cute hor.."..grin grin.. =D

i, tricia lim, resolve to work hard hard for the future..

hence..i am going for another interview this thursday at a clinic located at cck st 51 (yew tee). this is a clinic assistant position.. working hours are totally ideal to me. 7-9pm. i finish off at school at6pm and head straight towards the clinic to work. only problem is for the class camps, i might have to just take excuse and leave the camp for 2hrs to work. the best thing is at least i can get superboy to give me lift back to camp if i need to rush back.

many many camps ahead for the next few months. inhales deeply. somehow all the camps are killing alot of other arrangements for other stuff.

went recce at bahtera campsite with cm and sl.. the sheer amount of sops for the usage of a simple campsite is overwhelming. a simple night trek also requires risk mgmt report?? safety vehicles? faints. loads of rigidity too..

tonite's dinner...i'm going to attempt to cook pasta for superboy and i..inspired by pastamania dinner last nite! yummy yummy...

hope a good pasta dinner will chase our monday blues away =)

i was hearing it wrong

it's 630am in the morning..have been turning and tossing in bed.. i heard some rumbles and mistook them as knocks on the main door..ran out to the door only to be filled with another bout of disappointment to find no one there at all. despairingly, i dragged myself back to bed only to find myself drift in and out of sleep. most of the time conscious..awaiting for something good to happen and light up my moment. yet as i sit here..waiting for the sun to rise..somehow that will be what fills the room with light in time to come.

i hate my hair..what a mushroom head i am! time for a change..mean time i just got to patiently await for my tresses to grow longer.. waiting can be such a painful process sometimes.

time to catch an hr of sleep before i have to head out to rl.

beans, check!

a last entry before i head off to malaysia to spend my chinese new year.

work has been gradually streaming in..and there'll be alot of things to be done after the long weekend. bz..but bz is always better than idling. i'm just thankful for good superiors and fun colleagues.. =)

some disagreement with mum and i'm just hoping she'll soon understand my stand on things. as i thought thru her words, there is much truth in it but i guess i'm still going to insist on my decisions and plans for now. if i do grow to regret it, it is my decision after all. consequence is mine to bear. wa.sounds so serious..actually it's just a small issue.

it's that time of the month again. hate it coz it coincides with my nice long holi..and i got to be stuck with thick slices of blood sucking pads on me. drats.

i have appetite for nothing but chocolates. feeling fat. fat butt. can feel water retention. i can't wait for our short runs over the weekend. bringing our free along so we can test running with them..let's see how FREE we can get ya..hopefully not SORE.

stretch cordz, check. badminton racquets, check. books, check. beans, check. all things in for our nice holiday away from the usual.

superboy's coming soon..got to go lug my bags and head off now..

alrites..happy chinese new year to all..gong xi fa cai! =) hope u'll enjoy ur long wkend too!!

lost in the woods

this week's training log

mon: rest..body ached badly after stretch cordz
tue: 7km run with superboy
wed: 5km noon interval run at sch track
thur: macrit round+getting lost then running from museum to another. night stretch cordz
fri: macrit round (no getting lost this time) + round island with westrider?(tbc)
sat: tbu
sun: tbu


superboy asked me to borrow some books back during cny holiday so i can read them at home. it's a good idea..and i have just in mind the kinds of books i want to feed myself on. books on cross cultural issues in Asean, that'll be beneficial for our isle programme.

stretch cordz yesterday was challenging but i think as our bodies adapts themselves to such training, they are growing stronger every time we do the workout. after stretch cordz, we had a game of hop scotch, which was readily on the ground of the playground where we did our workout.

work's gradually streaming in.. things are boiling up and i can feel the heat of excitement in rcel. woohooo!

for my role, no matter how small it may seem, i will want to do it to the best of my abilities..

no more skiving for now..back to work!! toodaloo!

from the inside out

superboy and i were just angst-ing over my ex-team mate's recent collision with the malaysian law. like superboy puts it, "they are just creating a mountain out of a molehill.. ..aren't they just accentuating the scandalous loopholes in their system, which are better left unturned." my respond to it all? bleah. sent off an sms to tony and encouraged him to persist in appealing for his stand. it wasn't wholly his fault, in my view.

i succumbed to the gastric woes and finally went to consult dr kee for medication. no histac this time, but rather 4 kinds of medicine which included a suspension which tastes a lot better than mylanta. hope this gastric goes off soon..

anytime for macrit run during lunch today?? if not i'll just go round the stadium.

rl's going to change its staff purchase policy?! oh gee..c'mon la..stop making it so difficult for the part timers. perhaps i better start looking out for alternatives..in case things get a little too unbearable at least i'll have something else on my plate.

oh yes..talk about alternatives..we're tossing with the possible idea of "stowing away" at mum's shop during weekends. we've just got to try things out i guess.. maybe it'll turn out to be something good. =) meantime..we're still deciding on a name that'll be appropriate.. weekend indulge? happy food? indulge?

the good and the evil

THE GOOD AND THE EVIL
mummy's new oven! pineapple tarts turned out really good when we tried in it yesterday. =)
the devilish tormentor - stretch cordz =(

tomorrow never comes

gosh. tricia's half awake today. monday morning blues.

first i was aching so badly from stretch cordz training yesterday i decided to hop on a train than bike. what a lazy bum =S

took a train and dropped off at the wrong station. i kept thinking i'll be alighting at tpy..so i ended up at braddell. but thank God i made it to work right on the dot.

i left my pencilcase and file at running lab (AGAIN!) knocks her head. awww man! my note books..training stuff..stationery.. thankfully superboy will be helping me drive mummy's new oven down to shop..so i'll probably pop by to pick it up later in the evening.

oh yes...bought mummy a new oven so that she can bake in the shop and not have to rush for mad in the morning to get baking done and also make it to the shop on time to start business. i ended up buying something almost twice my initial budget but i felt it was one of the better ovens worth the cost.

i need a new noisy alarm clock so that it jolts me up from sleep in the morning..my cheapo $4.90 brinjal clock croaks like a toad now. noisy! then again, frankly, alarm clocks don't really work for me..the best method to wake me up - superboy's black face. no matter how tired i am, i would still crawl out of bed. =P

okies..today is rest day so i can recover from the aches n pain. proper training starts tomorrow.

tomorrowwwwwwwwww..never COMES! hhaheheaae..=)

new processes

driving test has been rescheduled to 5 jun 07. morning 1st slot. $20 only..to think i paid $150 for the school test slot. crap!

new resolutions..

1. to bike to work daily.
that'll require me to wake up early every morning especially if i want to save some time and take the bt timah route. if i'll be taking the mandai route, it's definitely more hills to overcome. that in turn means i got to have the discipline to wake up early! oh man!

2. to run regularly at macrit & do my track intervals
now that macrit and the track are a stone away, i ought to take full advantage of it and clock suffice mileage to sail though my upcoming marathons

3. swim
got to find more time to swim and also do stretch cordz

4. earn more money
i wish i knew how..mean time just got to keep up with my part time job. bo bian. new job doesn't pay me any better than before. =(


things on my kiv list
1. sports massage course
2. sports first aid and sports trainer course
3. badminton lessons