exam progress

not that it is already christmas..just that i haven't got any pictures to put up as i've removed my thumbdrive from the workstation. hence i'm just taking anything i can get from my pictures folder.

progress of the revision for this sat's paper is going pretty well. i am so thankful that i haven't got much to do at work these days and i can use most of my time in the office to revise. i managed to go through both my test paper and the sample exam paper. i feel alot more prepared for the exam after doing so. i'm left with 2 more tutorials to work through, which i plan to complete tonight.

i have more or less pieced my eva assignment together but i want to run through the last valuation portions again. they look extremely weird and i am unsure if it's correct. the assignment is scaring my nerves off because it's really much tougher than it looks. i'm pretty lost with it to be honest. tomorrow is the deadline and i will try to do whatever i can.

after this sat's fsa paper, it'll be full speed ahead for eva revision. another 9 days more and i will be done for the term.

gee. i can't wait for this to end.

sleepless nights

i lied wide awake till 1am, tossing, turning and unable to get to sleep.

i took 1 melatonin at 11pm. it brought a few yawns but no rest. at 1am i was desperate and i popped another one. i continued tossing and turning till i can't remember what time i finally slept.

when i opened my eyes this morning, it was 6.40am and i had missed my bus =( fortunately public transport this morning spared me more agony by ferrying me to work in the record time of 1 hour. it's a feat, considering the mad jam at tuas.

the eva assignment is pushing me to my limits. as i come to the final 2 parts of the assignment, i am faced with scraps of information i cannot piece together. after the disappointing partnership with sxxxxx that finally fell apart, i am fighting this alone. i'm looking forward to have marilyn back as classmate for next term as she has been a study buddy i have tossed many thoughts with.

i really want to wrap this assignment up as soon as possible. i will try to work through till midnight to finish this today. i really want to sleep. i need the rest. without rest, i am close to the brink of breakdown.

mr25 cross country yield

our trophies.. first time in my life i won a trophy for running. when i was in primary school i always got kicked out of track races in the HEATS. hahaha

we had a bountiful yield this year at mr25's cross country marathon.

dearie came in 3rd at 3:53, i only managed at 5:03 but as many girls dropped out, i got 2nd!

the rest of the team did well too; chia came in 2nd at 3:48 and thomas 4:44. isabel and eric didn't manage to complete but did 2 laps..so that was good training for them =)

i was glad i did not give up like last year. i was just hoping to complete it. it was really mental as i ran 3/4 of the race alone.. i did 1/2 with isabel on lap 1 and only managed to catch up with another lady at the golf course of lap 4.

somehow seeing that lady helped me speed up. after arriving at the last drink station together, i quickly gulped the drink and sped off. i knew it was just another 2.5k+ and i needed to stay ahead of her. at least to be 1 position ahead of her. in the last tormenting sloping 400m, dearie ran with me, in his slippers and that helped me chiong to the end. i was hoping to complete it in 5hrs but was off by a little. nevertheless, placing 2nd came as an added bonus.

thursday i'll bring h20 down..to thank those who came to support us.. and to share my joy with the rest of the team.

much thanks to the following who were there today: weeling, brian, sham, lucas, baldwin, yenling & jessica.

it matters if you are black or white

I want to give myself a small pat on the back – managed to finish another tutorial yesterday night. It stretched me out to 12mn once again and I almost overslept, if not for dearie’s noisy hp alarm.

The week’s revision progressed relatively smoothly and I’m keeping my fingers crossed that the next 2 weeks will continue to be so. I have kept close to schedule of revision and I’ve been very blessed that work volume has decreased to a point I could spend close to 4 hours working on my assignment yesterday. Everyone’s pretty free after the audit and board meeting. We’ve met the deadline for may’s closing and this is the window of breather we’ll are getting until the cycle starts in 3 weeks’ time.

To me it’s a blessing because this break is timely for me to rush my assignment. However, I do not want to take it for granted and i am being cautious not to be caught for doing personal studies. yet, if I were to look around my department, at least I am utilizing time to learn something. To me, it’s better than flipping magazines, newspapers and watch online streaming movies?

Run training was great yesterday. I went to weigh myself to confirm my weight gain. Argh. I’ve put on 2 kgs! =( yet, what I cannot fathom is, despite gaining weight, I’ve gotten faster. i’ve been able to clock 1.30min for 400m, which to me is a feat. I never imagined myself doing so..but through the rigorous training, I am doing it! =D hee. I’m not going to compare with dearie; 1.30/400m is easy-moderate pace! Thomas and dearie were doing 1.30-1.35 pace yesterday for 1.2km (4sets) and they were chatting and laughing through the sets. What a contrast when you look over and see my crumpled and twisted face while doing 1.30pace!

Dearie posed the question, “do you want to be skinny and slow or heavier but fast?” honestly I was thinking to myself, “can I be skinny and fast?” =P greedy tricia wants the best of both worlds. If I do have to pick, then I’ll pick the latter. I want to be fast and run the races, giving my all. I want to finish and know I could not have done it any better. =)

Running is so much like life. If you choose to be mediocre, you will always be stuck in the gray area of neither black nor white. you either be black. Or white. =)

exams update

In view of the upcoming exams in less than 2 weeks’ time, I have drafted up a study timetable. Since I haven’t got the luxury of numerous hours per day to revise, I can only plan the meager few evening hours I have.

The main aim of the schedule is to cover all the tutorials and sample exam papers. Fortunately, I have gone through fsa textbook once, hence that will enable me to dive straight into tutorials. There are 11 tutorials and I have spread them out to complete within 1 week. Yesterday I planned to complete 2 tutorials, which I managed to achieve. Wee! But that took me all the way to 12mn. o_O

Another thing to be thankful of is the lightened workload since end of audit. I could spend about 2 hours (including lunch break) to look at my eva assignment. Let’s see if I can hold through today again without taking a noon nap.

I hope the workload will stay stable at least till end of the month; let me get through the exams.

Tonight I’ll still be going training and I will work through 1 more tutorial after which. I should take me at least an hour. Need loads of determination to hold through because the natural inclination after training is to shower and hop into bed.

Within the schedule I’ve also segregated the 8 eva tutorials I need to cover over 1 week. Good thing I’ve covered 2 of them so I’m only left with 6. challenge will be more of the assignment which I am delving into it..and I’m unsure if my justifications make sense. I want to do a good one..but I’m a little lost. Let me gather my points and then I’ll email the lecturer for some clarification.

I feel bad that dearie has to go through exams with me again. It can get pretty boring as I have to spend many hours with the books and he is always with me.

Good thing dearie will be starting school soon in august.. at least he will have things to keep him busy! =P

Gee. The entire post is about studies. Hope I’ve not bore you off. But that’s everything on my mind now. I’m working hard to get through this. i’m driving myself to do this term well.. at least get this over and done with. I don’t want it to flow through to another term..like what has happened. =(

Focus at the end! 3 weeks to end of exams. 3 months to end of term 3. ½ year to end of the programme. In that perspective, all the toil will not last forever. At least it is bringing me one step closer to my goal in life.. and that is what makes the hard work worth it. =)

holiday at pa's

With the close of the audit and finalisation of the board meeting reports, the pace at work slowed down tremendously. Coming back from a 3-days holiday at pa’s place, I am recharged to go full speed ahead at work. However, it was surprising that over the long weekend, there were only 2 emails in my inbox and neither of them needed attention to. As a routine, I would list down the tasks to complete for the day/week, and that came out to be just to close accounts for 4 companies. That was it. Wow.

I have 2-3days to finish that and meeting that target should not be a problem. =)

The short break at pa’s place was refreshing, albeit the long journey up. We are blessed with a pool which we could dive and enjoy, at our own privacy. It was an utter indulgence in seafood and ma’s home cooked food. I relish having family dinners more often.

Sleep was something dearie and I caught up with during the break. We slept. A lot. I didn’t get to complete much of the assignment but revision for eva was pretty good. I worked through assignment 1 and that will pave the way for assignment 2.

It is now less than 2 weeks before fsa exam. I’ve got to work through revision fast, while juggling time between eva assignment as well.

The episode with school was dreadful and it changed my perspective about the school. I just want to get over and done with it.. and should I take a mba in the future, I will definitely opt nus/ntu/smu. I have decided not to appeal for anything and just go with what they “recommend”. I hope to do better and will not waste any more savings.

I will take up a tuition assignment after exams. Accounts is my forte and zx is my ex-student. I hope I can be of some help to her for the coming O levels.. and at the same time it will also add a little more to our savings. Time does not permit me to take up the boy whose mother called me last week. Given the 2 modules I have to take next term, I do not have the luxury of time to travel. I do hope he finds a suitable tutor who can help him.. =)

MR cross country is this Sunday. We are not hopeful that the team will turn up to support us, given the cold treatment from coach. Nevertheless, the 6 of us will still race as a team. I hope to do my personal best.. got to start warming up my legs as I have not ran since last Thursday, but I’ve swam though!

Today will do some easy run and core exercises at the stadium. Tomorrow I am thinking of going for an easy run as well. Thursday I’ll be at training but will not push myself. Fri would love to go swim (getting back into the hype of swimming after doing so at pa’s place)..sat maybe easy 5k run and I will be geared up for sun. Does the plan sound ok?

So much for the update. Will post up some photos we took at pa’s place soon! =)

failure hurts

it felt like i've rammed into a brick wall. it hurts terribly. but i know i should not dwell upon it for too long.

it will be nice to just hide away in a cave right now. i don't feel like doing anything for a while. it's giving my wounds time to heal.

yet time and tide waits for no man. i got 2 assignments due really soon and exams beckoning from a close proximity. somehow the last result left me uncertain how i will cope with the upcoming exams. i really have to hibernate at home and get down to serious mugging.

i must get through this. i must get through this. i MUST GET THROUGH THIS.

FSA textbook DOWN

i am done with FSA text book. now onto the assignment. reading the entire textbook gives me a picture of what i'm suppose to get out of this module.

i can't imagine reading the EVA textbook because it's thicker than the bible. -gulps- my strategy for EVA will be the 'attack' the questions head-on. That's because Mr Graeme has delivered good lectures that helped us understand the context of EVA.

On contrary, the FSA lecturer dictated the slides; of which all the info was found in the textbook. I drifted off during lecture, thanks to his gibberish slang. Hence, I'm left with no other choice but to do the reading myself.. which I have just completed doing so! ahhhhhhhh..good =)

Have to get the assignment out by Sunday and email it to Marilyn for consolidation. This assignment is due next Friday..got to work hard.

Good thing EVA assignment deadline has been postponed till 19th. So I've got a fair bit of time to work things out and also revise for the exams on 20th and 27th.

the beacon

I gave thought to the role my significant half plays in my life. As we perused into our savings plan and target for the year, his role became evident – a beacon.

Definition from Wikipedia

A Beacon is an intentionally conspicuous device designed to attract attention to a specific location.

Beacons help guide navigators to their destinations.

We discussed how we should budget our spendings, how much we intend to have at the end of the year, how we can plan for a holiday... our plan for the coming year..our studies.. he has helped mould my thinking into one that looks afar. No more living for the day..now it’s living for the days ahead.

I remember telling him one day I don’t see anything at the end of the tunnel – in regards to work. He told me, “It’s ok if you don’t see the end. Just have to see the light.”

To me that is powerful as indeed that’s life. No one can fully predict and be totally sure what we will become in the next few decades to come.. but we have ideas and dreams conjured in our minds of where we want to be, what we want to have. These goals are collectively the light that should guide us through.

The burden of work and studies weighed upon me heavily since the start of the 2nd term. There was a lot of dissatisfaction in me since I got to know the pay disparity too. Yet all that gloom gradually dissipated after dearie guided me to understand there are greater things ahead to look forward to; rather than to dwell in the present.

And I concur with what Ma says, “what comes after bitterness will be sweetness”.

I have a beacon in my life – he shines the way to go when I get lost in the dark. And I realize one thing too: You can only see the light if you lifted your head up. When you kept your head hanging low and faced to the ground, you become oblivious to the light.

Hang on, dear friends. We are all in this journey together. We will reach the end of the tunnel. =)

3 persons i will meet in heaven

these are the 3 persons i am sure i will meet in heaven.. because they keep me sane and going on. in no particular order =) thank you for being in my life - dearie, mummy & christin.

and not forgetting dw who listens to my rants too.

i am facing a tough juncture in life and balancing the scale between work and studies is tearing me apart. nonetheless, having all of you around keeps me going.

it's hard but it's worth it

The attitude of a colleague at work really irks me big time. She is a nice person in nature, just that when it comes to work, there’s been quite a change in her performance..and her frequent disappearance from work is definitely not helping. As much as I would like to give her the benefit of doubt, there is a limit to that. Perhaps the bonus payout was not handsome enough for her appetite. Then again, I thought she performed pretty well last year, hence I believe her appraisal ought to be pretty decent?

I’m not in the position to probe more but it just irks me as work piles up for me. If given a say for headcount, I will suggest to give her the boot and hire someone who can be of more help in the department. She’s quite a waste of resources..and not improving the efficiency of the department. Let’s not mention about the pay disparity too.

Dearie and I clocked a marathon last weekend. We did a 30km (dearie did 31.5km) on Saturday at macritchie. On Sunday, we did the 10.4km passion run. If we include the 1km warm up..that’s a full marathon over 2 days!

I am thankful dearie was around on Sunday to pace me through the entire race. After the torturous 30k on Saturday, my itb and hamstring were screaming “ouch” and the tummy upset in the morning really killed me (squatting in the toilet 10min is no joke)..

nonetheless running beside him gave me strength to keep going. He talked to me through the entire run…running up to the water stations to get drinks for me..and kept encouraging me on. He told me my timing at every km.. told me my pace for the whole race.. helped me calculate how long I would be able to complete the run if I kept at XXX pace.. I was too tired to process all the computations he made.. I just knew I must keep up with dearie.. though in fact he was trying to accommodate to my snail pace run. Seeing Vivian pace a guy at the last 1km urged me to keep up. Dearie sped up and prompted me to pick up.. I struggled on to keep up but was finally able to overtake that guy and several others along the way too!

The time stopped. 10.4km in 57.24mins. wow. To me, it was a result beyond my expectation. I gave myself an estimate of 1hr 5mins to finish the 10.4km; given the ache and pain from the 30km. it was a good run.. and completing it at a time I have not expected was a bonus. I was only able to do so because dearie was there =) thank u dearie.

Turning the page, I now have to face with 2 assignments and 2 exams. It is a huge burden on my heart.. as I need to do a lot of reading and research for the assignments and also set aside sufficient time to revise for the exams. The next 1 month will be very trying.. and I am very stressed out now. I'll have to comb through the internet for data.. dissecting the information.. it's a heady brew!! Going to sleep is difficult, as thoughts on the assignment piles on my chest like an anvil.

I need to get through this. I can get through this. I WILL get through this.

Everyone gets the same 24hours a day. If others can do it, why can’t i? it’s just a month, things will get better after this month. Hang on tricia. You are a fighter =)

steinway & sons

dearie said he'll buy me a steinway and sons grand piano if i can play like that..hohoh.. in my dreams! =P

and this is yukie nishimura playing on a steinway & sons concert grand. the sound quality of the piano is sweet.

i have never touched a steinway & sons grand piano in my life. this has become one of my lifelong dream - to play a single chord on one! woohooo..

music

classical music never gets outdated.

bravo!

look at li yundi play..bravo!!

i'm addicted to youtube..because i can listen to all these music.. which i dream of playing but don't think i'll ever be able to. haha. i'll enjoy the maestro play them.. because they do so beautifully. if i play, i'll be creating too much noise pollution. =P

tricia has never played rachmaninov

this may be the solution! i may ONE DAY play rachmaninov if i had those extensions! =D

1 down..a few more to go

it is now 7am in the morning. i have just submitted my EVA assignment. Slept at 12mn last night, woke up 4.30am this morning. finally got this off my shoulders. i've got class at 10am. i feel like running. I am praying for a short day at FSA class.

I am mentally tired. No MR for me..i just want to enjoy my run around my place this morning. have a good shower, go to class. finish class, come home and fall face flat on the bed. zzzz. maybe i'll be able to sleep better tonight. i've been having sleepless nights thinking about the eva assignment.

FSA assignment is due in 2.5weeks. my brain isn't working well to think about it right now. let's only think about it on monday..

run strong

The weekend was fruitful because i managed to accomplish quite a few things I had set out to do.

1. made good progress on my assignment. I’m almost half way through it. I’m only left with the forecasting bit which is more challenging but I’ll work out the figures soon to plug into my spreadsheet. Shouldn’t be too tough I hope.

2. spent time with dearie. we spent sat together at home doing work and resting. I like being at home..because I don’t get to do it much since I started school. I had lots of time to work on my assignment and rest when I wanted to.

3. spent time shopping with mummy. Dearie took us to tampines 1 and I bought some new clothes and bag for mummy. Seeing the sparkle in her eyes just made me feel happy. I bought new shirts for dearie too!

4. did some good quality training. Friday we were at ecp doing beach training. it was tiring but good, because everyone was left sore the next day. we rested on Saturday. Sunday a group of us did mr25’s progressive run. It’s the best 20km I’ve done so far at macrit. The timing may not be fantastic but i just felt great during and after the run. During my 2nd loop, I consciously practiced the 2 in 2 out breathing method dearie taught me and it worked. My pace was in sync with the breathing and I wasn’t out of breath even as I trotted uphill. The last 2 long upslopes took much out of me but I had enough strength to sprint the last 100m to the end. What is most heartening was hearing the mr25 timekeeper uncle said this to me.

Uncle: “ young lady, you’ve improved.”
Me: “waa. You remember me?”
Uncle: “of course, you did the ultra marathon last year.”

He saw improvement in me and it affirmed my hard work. I am tempted to try for the time trial..but I know I’m not a sprint person….yet I yearn to be part of the mr25 fleet for some reason or another..because I love mr..and mr25 is a distinguished group.

Can’t wait for the next weekend to come as we’ll be traveling back to Segamat. Got to continue to stay on running form in the midst of all the feasting! =D

billy prata

we had prata for dinner tonight. canned curry and sambal as side dishes. dearie scored me 9! =) it's surprising how delicious the ntuc prata turned out to be. i'm just happy seeing dearie enjoy the food. he had 3.75 slices and i had 2.25. =)

new cars coming up!

the new cars coming up.. pa's peugeot 206.. rally car! (work in progress)..and tricia's new red ferrari. (with 177 parts..faints) this will be a masterpiece..because it has movable parts.. can open the doors..can open the boot and see the engine from behind. (dearie..i want ALL my decals in place ya..don't disintegrate them ya..especially my carbon engine..hohohh)

tricia test drives her new car

after a week of hard work, my dearie completed the building of my new car! it is called xiao ang ku kuey.. because dearie's car is called ang ku kuey..and this is the exact replica of it. =)

i brought the car for test drive.. and one wheel fell off.. it started to rain and my window leaked (=P because dearie filed my window la!) apart from these.. no complaint about it! love it..because it's red.. it's small..and cute!

next in line..dearie will be building a peugeot for pa...and a FERRARI for me!