mono at part time

i'm feeling like i'm suffering from mono with this part time job. just a little burnt out.

yenling and i have made plans to spend christmas together. we'll be extending the invitation to isabel too. it'll be like a girls night! hopefully bel doesn't bring her beetroot salad to the party..haha

what should i do? stop? quit?

i'm somewhat unsure how dec will look. pretty sure i'll be busy with work, ot-ing daily for an extended period of time.

i do not actually need the money that badly. it's extra pocket money and it's pretty brainless work too. just that sometimes the sacarsm from the boss can be a wee too much. on top of the flashing of her xx carat diamond ring (which almost blinded me under the sunlight) and gawdy fashion show parade of her branded bags.. all that in rojak comparison of how calculative and mercenary she can sometimes be.. shrugs. i try not to think about it too much into it.

yea, maybe i should not think so much about it. just move along for now. it's not painfully unbearable, yet.

eclipse next

i'm done with new moon. i thought the movie got a little draggy at the end, the book is way MORE draggy! but i think reading is alot less yawn+sleep inducing than actually seeing actors and actresses put up a show that making way too many detours.

i thought the twilight series started well with the first. the story kind of plunges into a boring drag in the 2nd. now i'm on to the third. not particularly excited about it; i'm reading it more because i want to finish what i started. a story should have an ending. i want to read the series in totality.

i'm giving myself till end of next week to finish eclipse.

the kindle is the best thing in my bag right now. without it, i will not be able to devour so many books. it's a gem!

read liberated

i never noticed how reading can be..liberating.

i can be that pair of eyes looking at someone's life. i can almost hear the protagonist's heart speak from the words. for a moment, i can almost feel like i'm standing at the cliff's edge. the next moment, feels like i've got a vampire breathing down my neck.

knowledge sets one free too. being in the know. understanding why things happen the way they do.

i've almost cleared out that stack of old newspapers underneath my workstation. i'm only left those dated a month ago. it should all be done by tomorrow.

i'm more than 60% done with new moon. i'll try to finish it by sunday. watch eclipse on sat or sun then read eclipse. the plan is to read breaking dawn..because it'll be a long while before i'll be able to catch the show itself.

the next 2 books will well bring me to somewhere close to year end closing, by then, i'll be so stretched at work to have much energy left for reading.

alright.. time to look into the cfmas exams which could be the new goal for 2012. fics..cfmas. hmm..next year might be a busy year!

seven billion

un leader, mr ban ki moon, has this to say on the birth of the seven billionth child.

where ever he or she is born, "will be born into a world of contradiction". "plenty of food, but still a billion of people going to bed hungry every night. many people enjoy luxurious lifestyles, but still many people are improverished".

"Seven billion people who need enough food. Enough energy. Good opportunities in life for jobs and education. Rights and freedoms. The freedom to speak. The freedom to raise their own children in peace and security."

"Everything you want for yourself - seven billion times over".

wow. seven billion.

7,000,000,000.

new moon

done with twilight. the movie was pretty true to the book. a sweet romance novel.

i'm suppose to slot a non fiction book between this but i think i may just end up with new moon next. haha.

not so lucky

i had 100/1500 chance of winning something..but i got none. -pout-

ok, i have to admit i never had luck with lucky draws.

the d&d programme was a little boring. the food was alright. the company was good though.

winning the lucky draw would have made the uneventful night fantastic.

bare some fangs

i am behind target for twillight..only slightly more than half way through the book..but i'm enjoying the book..it's one of those nice lovey-dovey romance novels..though it still lacks that sweep-me-off-the-feet kind of tryst in the judith mcnaught novels i love. maybe vampires and werewolves feels much too surreal..too far fetched than the dukes, knights and medieval dudes..

so target has been moved backwards to next week.

oh ya..review of the high fidelity movie we caught over last weekend.

it has 50% less vulgarities..it put up about 85% of what you can read in the book. overall a pleasant movie though dearie fell asleep half way through it.

twilight up next

this is next on the list. target to complete by end of the week.

maybe i'll hop back onto the catch me if you can bandwagon..then hobble back to this series again.

let's see how it goes.

after seeing so many good playing on the guitar through the weekend, i have an impetus to take guitar lessons..progress on from my G-C-D chords. then again..playing the guitar hurts my fingers. i get this tender to touch on my fingertips before hard skin starts to form. it makes playing the piano uncomfortable after playing the guitar. argh. i think i'll stick to listening to guitar music for the easier way out of things. hahahah

high fi done

High Fidelity done. funny book in a crude way. it was like reading into the author's mind.

what's next? should i start my twillight series now?

next: high fidelity

a whole new mind done. today i started high fidelity (paperback).

target to finish by end of this week or beginning of next.

i want to read my twillight series after this.

hoho, when are my finance books going to be next in line?

good quote from a whole new mind

The capacity to see the big picture if perhaps most important as an antidote to the variety of psychic woes brought forth by the remarkable prosperity and plentitude of our times. Many of us are crunched for time, deluged by information, and paralysed by the weight of too many choices. The best prescription for these modern maladies may be to approach one’s own life in a contextual, big-picture fashion – to distinguish between what really matters and what merely matters.

half way through this book and i've got to many good quotes to keep.

ahh..i want a copy of this book for keeps!

wowow..i'm onto the last bits of the book and u know what? daniel pink (the author) actually made reference to viktor frankl and his book, man's search for meaning. that was the book i read right before this.

i love reading! =) especially when i get to read and listen to mahler's symphony at the same time. hohoho!

a new mind?

completed man's search for meaning.

onto a whole new mind in HARDCOVER. it's so un-tricia to be lugging a hardcover in her bag.

got to read 6 pages of catch me if you can. interesting read. that will be next after this one.

no blackie. i need meaning.

1/3 through with the black swan and i gave up. it is beyond me. clockwork orange made better sense than this book. this is a far cry from fooled by randomness. this was one of the very few occasions which i didn't even bother to browse through the rest of the book and simply closed it shut (literally, because mine was in soft copy).

i thought i wanted to read something which made more sense, so it's on to this.. man's search for meaning. =)

night review

i finished Elie Wiesel's Night. It is a great book! =)

Found this photo which was described in the book, the gate to the camp which bore the words "Arbeit Macht Frei" (it means Work Sets You Free). How oxymoronic.

Next book, back to The Black Swan.

i got deviated from the next book on the to read list. this is because i spent lunch time reading up about holocaust (just to give me a better understanding of the context which diary of anne frank was written in).

i googled for "good books on holocaust" and found out i have one ebook in my kindle which was rated quite well! therefore, taking a skip from the black swan, my official next read is this:


not a very thick book..so target to complete this by mid or late next week.

read

completed this after a break from it for mags:

this is next on the line..managed to find a soft copy which i can read over my kindle. target to complete? end of the month. will update my next read soon!

define success

a recent sense of aimless awakened me to find goals for my time in the company.

i walked through a shopping mall on the way to my part time work; i was surrounded by youths. it reminded me of my younger years which don't seem too far off. my mummy has never given me excessive pressure on how i should perform in school, but just reminded me to always do my best.

i listened to the standford's commencement speeches steve jobs and oprah made.

he talked about connecting the dots, that we cannot see into the future how things work together. we only start to connect the dots when we look back.

a good education opens doors. i sat on a table with bankers over dinner, one of the analyst (presumably the lowest tier in investment banking) was an imperial college graduate.

while i try to tell myself, how successful you are is not determined by that college certificate (looking at the richest people in the world, not many even graduated from college), but the truth is good education will give you some form of leverage in life.

i haven't had a fabulous education which i can flaunt of but i hope i can still do some catch up now. i am not sure if my non-confrontational personality will be good as i move on..yet i know i don't want to become someone i am not.

ok, back to goals. my short term goal while i serve my "term" is to read tenaciously. i want to devour as much publications as i can. i'm almost done with my outdated bloomberg markets mags, though old editions, still contain relevant information. my company has a library with a reasonable collection of books, open for staff to borrow. i think i should make use of that resource. as dearie works in a tertiary institution now, that literally means i have greater access to even more publications. after i finish my current to-read-list, i am getting dearie to help me borrow bloomberg markets mags regularly for reading.

i've started my garang guni work in office again. i've been getting colleagues to pass me old newspapers which are due for disposal from the racks. those are usually straits times and business time which are 3-5days old. i collect them in a neat pile underneath my table and i read them over lunch. apart from the news websites, these are the sources of current affairs updates. ahh..so much to read but so little time. did i say i want to start reading chinese papers too? never quite got around them too! (haven't seen chinese papers in the office too)

i've been penning my learning into emails and sending them to dearie and bro. i hope i don't bore them off..but i think sharing it helps me learn better..

i listen to definitions of success. everyone define success differently to much extent. i think i should be working harder to earn more. i think i should be saving more. i think i should be more aggressive at work.. but looking back at it, at the end of the day, does it give me the success..or "success" in inverted commas? somehow, i think being happy is important. i am happy when i get to tinkle the ivories..i am happy when i can go for a good run.. i am happy when i can cook for dearie and he finishes all the food. i am happy when i can spend time with family.. do all these fall into the definition of success?

don't want to think too much. i'll just keep up with my learning and reading.. let's see where the road leads to. =)

cert collector

it has been another draining week at work. the long nights make the work feel like it's never ending. let's hope this ends in another 1-2weeks because those involved are over whelmed by the blistering speed reports have to be handed in.

it made me wonder how we can do things better and of course faster.

it made me think if i can do this for years to come.

a recent discussion with a new colleague made me feel life has to be more purposeful than just getting by. i am irritated by the term "cert collector" she used, because i value the learning process over that piece of paper. she probably thinks why have i attained so much academically but still not doing fantastically in my career development.

honestly, i must agree that good career development requires more than just academic qualifications. i have cornered myself by choosing to join my current job. i have no choice but to stay on and make the best of my time here. i tell myself repeatedly, next time it has to be a step forward, no more stepping backwards or staying on the spot anymore.

should i do the cfa is still a question mark. it's more a structured learning than actually getting that title itself, because to attain the title will be almost impossible for now given that i lack of the 4 yrs' relevant experience.

while i get this all figured out, i should be working on my financial model now (stilll not done and it's due soon!)

absolute randomness

This blog is so out of date. Will it become obsolete soon? I hope not. Things that we don’t constantly keep up with, tend to get phased out unknowingly.

So here I am, at my part time job, thinking how to start on my financial model. I have no idea where to start. It’s easy to take someone’s model and start changing improving..but to build one up from scratch is tough.

I have this long list of things I classify as I should do. But how many of those am I actually doing..eh.. I’ll rather not count. At this moment, the only thing I want to do is go home, laze around with dearie and sleep through another 2-3hours.

Last week at work was a tough one.. going on course for 3 days and having to go back to office every day after the course. I was feeling penalized for going on course. Nevertheless the course was enjoyable and I certainly learnt much.

The poa assignment didn’t quite work out in the end, too bad for a short assignment which could give me some additional earnings.

I am expecting a tough 2 weeks ahead. With the board paper and board meeting presentation slides due just a day apart, it’ll be like chasing after a mrt. But whatever it is, I just hope to do a good job which will earn me a decent appraisal by year end. After all, my bonus hinges on all these.

My sweet sour fish didn’t turn out fantastic last week. I hope the curry fish will be a better attempt tonight.

I better start working on my model now. No time to lose!

finally!

after talking about this for a long long time..i'm finally getting a dream come true. it is out of luck we chanced upon this buy..we are getting it less than half price for a 4 year old baby grand.

i'm excited..though i am also jittery about how i will justify buying it. it just means i will have to work another 1.5years of part time to fully recover this. for something like a piano, there'll be no economic return. it is not income generating; only noise generating in my case.

i think it gives me something to look forward to at the end of every work day. i'm not particularly excited by work these days. i feel happy thinking about coming home to see dearie.. to go for a run.. to have dinner with dearie and john. not forgetting to play the piano too! it's about finding joy in life. i think what brings joy is definitely outside the office :)