hotshot

This is so timely. Just when I need something to get excited about, I received a mail blast from uob kh on this.

It is the Macquarie Warrant Hotshot Competition. You can read more details here: http://hotshot.dbpower.com.hk/en/home_e.cgi

I have never traded warrants before though I theoretically know what they are. I think this will be a great opportunity to learn and also push myself to find out more. It will commence 10 Aug, so I have some time to read up more. It's paper trade so effectively i don't lose anything. But that's the thing..you can invest all you want. buy and sell at wish. no transaction cost. no need to worry about how it impacts your portfolio. It gets investors excited and because they have made the game "safe", making money from warrants seemingly become easy. I need to remind myself that after the game ends, whether i made or lost money, it is still virtual. Trading in reality is still different.

down with rain

i decided to give in to the cold/flu. took a day of medical leave. the rest certainly helped alot, although i'm pretty worried if the audit report would be ready by tomorrow morning.

i am feeling better now. ready for work and training once again.

spent most of the day pigging out in bed. managed to catch up with a wee bit of reading too.

have been wanting to blog about the awesome weekend but somehow the words don't flow. i just want to thank my 2 friends and dearie for the time. i haven't spent such a great time with friends for a long while. it was fun (though fun itself is insufficient a word to describe).. running from mr to pierce and back. shopping for running stuff. laughing over how the running top/shorts made us look sexy or fat. i will surely miss yenling as she goes off to uk for her mba.

casually talked to my colleagues yesterday about the company and its operations. i was telling them how i want to work around the problems encountered during audit this year; ensuring things will go more smoothly next year. i was a little disheartened when the more senior colleague commented, "that is if we are still around next year."

i got her to tell me more about how she felt the company was going and what she observed was the problem to the company's deficit position. she has been with the company for more than 15years and she has seen the company go through its different phases and management.

there seems so little which is within our control and means. the market has evolved in its last 15years of existence and somehow the business model has not been able to keep up with the change. changes were made but somehow it is still not meeting the market's needs.

on a pessimistic note, i am unsure how the company will hold on too. however, for the small role i play, the only thing i can do is to continue to perform my scope well. whether the company turns around, there are just too many variable factors which will come into play.

dearie will say,"don't think so much. just do your work."

it's going to be 3rd qtr soon. i actually planned to go for some short courses in 3rd or 4th q. on one hand i can clock some cpe hours, on the other to learn some new things/update myself. i should be able to get some funding from my company. =) let's see how this works out.

meantime, i think i need to start looking at some short-mid term goals because i feel a little aimless these days. academically i think i have managed to attain to a decent level. i have also settled down in the new job. training wise, i have also completed that which dearie drafted for me.

i don't want to stay at this point. got to keep up and move. the environment is changing. if we don't change fast enough, we will not keep up. i do not want to be written off as irrelevant.

rhythm of torrential rain

the rain which we encountered on sat was no plain ordinary rain. it was another flash flood and like the last round, many places were flooded.

maybe it was the rain but my nose are stuffed like the choked drains. i am gasping for air now.

contemplating if i should go see the doctor and get a day's rest..but that will mean i won't be able to chase the auditor tomorrow. argh. fall sick also must find the right time to do so. =(

skII review

my mum bought me a set of skII trial some time in apr. the trial set consisted of the facial cleanser, lotion, essence, anti aging serum and 1 mask. i gave the anti-aging serum to my mum and i haven't 'slurge' my mask.

so my 2 month's review on skII is on the cleanser, lotion and essence.

cleanser: this is the least impressive. first thing that hits u is the smell. i rather it is scentless, but the cleanser actually has a 'unique' smell. it is not totally awful that it puts me off, but it doesn't add points to the product. i find this cleanser pretty mild. i don't use this cleanser after my make up remover because i feel it doesn't leave my skin clean. i am guessing that it is meant to be gentle to the skin. i don't have that 'ahh..clean' feeling from it. it scores 6/10 for me.

lotion/toner: this feels average. it works almost like my lunasol and i don't think it is a product i will buy in actual size. it is so average i don't have much to review on. 6.5/10 for this one.

facial essence treatment(fte): this is one of the signature product of skII with 90% pitera. also known as 'miracle water' that will make your skin dewy and glowing. it retails nearly $200 for a full size bottle. this is the product i have been dying to try but too scroogey to part with my money for it. i was really amazed how this water can be sufficient as a moisturizer. the moisturizers i have used are either milky form or gel like.

i heard some reviews that it caused outbreaks but no such problems for me. it feels light and quickly absorbs into the skin. i think what i like best is that it can be used over eyes. i literally used this instead of the eye gel, will review on the eye gel below.

what i cannot reconcile was the beautician (during one facial session) actually commented my skin was dry, when i actually feel it was not. anyway, i don't think i will go back to her because i noticed her products actually caused my skin to scab after 2 sessions with her. will need to find other affordable alternatives as this beautician in segamat is able to provide facial at a fraction of those in singapore. yet, if the products do not suit me.. sigh. ok, back to skII.

i haven't looked at my skin with a microscope to see if the fte helped with minimising pore size. but what i can review is my skin hasn't had major outbreaks thus far and i like how the fte is absorbed into the skin, like water.

the only drawback is the price. i don't think the fte packs a miracle but it is a very good product for those who can afford it. it is a little over-rated. it doesn't turn you into qiqi or pan ling ling overnight, that i am sure.

there is a long way to go for skin care, apart from just hoping to find salvation from a bottle of pitera. proper cleansing, scrubs, food, sleep, water and diet. all that and more come into play.

will i buy it in full size? maybe.

will i follow it religiously? maybe.

i will score it 8.5/10. i take 1 off for the price and 0.5 to remind myself this will not make me a headturner with it alone.

the skII beauty consultant was kind enough to give me a sample of eye gel so i tried it.

eye gel: nothing happened. i am still panda. that 1-2fine lines are still there, unmoved. maybe i was too impatient to use it long enough to see results. but i actually rather use the fte on eyes than this gel.

so there concludes my skII review. i still have the mask to try. they call the mask a pamper because it contains 5times pitera. wowowow. i wonder if i will look like lim chiling after i remove the mask? (think the gatsby commercial where the normal guy became takuya after washing his face with gatsby facial foam). now that feels WOW!

hiao-O-monday

After yenling's raves about shiseido's softener, i went to look at their range..and i am resoluting to try them after i finish my skII trials and lunasol series.

ok my plan goes: i think i will start off with the softener after my FTE runs out. after my sunblock runs out, i'll try the protective emulsion, which i reckon is pretty similar to my lunasol one. i've still got plenty of lunasol cleanser, toner and moisturizer. so i think the moisturizing gel and cleanser will have to wait. and finally, if my counters make money, i will love to get the eye serum. target time to get them: end of the year after bonus payout. hoho. when my pockets are relatively fuller. i like the idea of a moisturizing gel. but i think this will be one of the last ones on the list.

brightening protective emulsion with spf 15. this will come after my lunasol sunblock runs out.

brightening balancing softener. this is TOP of the list want to get. after FTE runs out..which i think will happen in another 1-2months.

brightening cleansing foam. not super excited about this one. i will only try if the rest works. will try to see if i can get a sample of it.

eye serum!! i'm such a sucker for eye serums. i have NOT tried one that worked. i'm skeptical about this one if it can make me less a panda. try sample then talk.

brightening toning lotion. this should also be last on the line because i still have plenty of lunasol toner.

call me hiao but i concur with yenling that women SHOULD spend on skin care. i think it's our right to! (do i sound like a yenling-fan? =P i thought she is a kindred spirit)

i have actually considered shiseido..but i think i never got around it. i have spoken to a few ladies who also swear by shiseido..and their skin is actually fabulous. they are walking testimonials that the products work. oh yes, i want to talk about my skII trial since i have used it for slightly over 2 months. (this is so that i justify buying shiseido soon!) oh..women!

biking droughts & floods

i thought i could break my biking drought. hmm. drought sounds a bit weird but the thing is that i haven't biked in eons. the last time was the ride with dearie and alex..which was more than a year ago.

i am thankful yenling let me tag along and i was warning her if i fell, she mustn't laugh..or i'll whack her. haha..so we arranged to meet 4.30am along upp bt timah this morning.

at 3.45am i was up and got ready for the ride. dearie was worried, fully aware how clumsy i am and fearing the big-headed michelin mascot might fall, he got up and went out with me on his mtb. my escort =)

at 4.10am we were out. the ground was wet and i reckoned it rained earlier. dearie said it was raining but i said it was not. he probably had some foresight! so we biked out, heading to upp bt timah.

at teck whye it suddenly (and sudden it was!) the sky started to pour. it was madness. we were caught by surprise and scrambled to the nearest bus stop (in front of the cck polyclinic). we waited but the rain did not seem to cease. dearie suggested that he biked back and then drive out to pick me. it was dangerous to bike in the rain..with the poor visibility and slippery road. but he insisted the rain didn't seem like it would stop for a long while and so i relented. dearie came back quickly in less than 25mins and we were headed home.

the rain was bad i read from fb that there was a mini-flood in telok kurau. apparently that friend sighted a fridge in the middle of the road. wow. i wonder how the fridge got there. the carpark next to our block was also a little flooded.

so much for an attempt to bike. i was a little worried about my bike handling actually..but i realised i still love the feeling of being on the bike. i love the geometry of my bike..and i felt regretful why would i want to put it for sale. i have posted the brake lever of my bike on the left..no particular reason why brake lever..i have a strange affinity with brake levers(not this particular one..another one which is still in my study room).. and i thought the angle of this shot looked pretty professional. haha..at least from this amateur's point of view.

so i resolve to attempt to bike again. hmm. maybe next sat?

it was kind of nice sleeping in till 10.30am. ahh. we should go for an easy run before curry istimewawa! nice weather to stay home and do tons of reading. business times. straits times. technical analysis. chomp down more info. grow myself intellectually. that's the only kind of chomping that actually does NOT get me fat.

did u hear i was on k-pop? dearie is getting mildly irritated with my boyband k-pop playlist. hoho. who knows i might get to meet some of them on the streets next year..and i can go up and say Ahn-Nyeong Hah-Seh-Yo!!!

where the p stands

after watching the youtube video made me ponder about the p word.

one would probably condemn the torture that man had to go through for 2 decades. why would someone be punished for standing with his beliefs? those were good beliefs that were intended to benefit than rob.

however, p is like a well which one cannot see the end to.

i don't find blame in those who did what they did, because that was how the world worked. it is happening every second, not just during those formative days of the nation. look around you. look at your company. look at the leisure clubs you join. so long there is hierarchy, so long there is a position of power, there will be a struggle.

how about sharing everything with everyone? does it make the world a better one? seemingly not.

i don't think there is a best way of doing things. there is no one perfect system which is better than another. it all falls upon a balance and the balancing is a continual effort. we constantly have to add or less the burden on each end.

they say those who does the balancing are one of the best paid. i'm wondering would those who rant about it want to take on such a responsibility themselves? to front movements and changes. to be criticized most of the time. do we have the capacity to take up a role like that? i don't think i can. well, at least i feel those who are doing so are doing a fantastic job. you know chinese like to say 一分钱一分货(translation: you get what you pay for).

so, if this system is not good, what will you suggest? how do you think your suggested system will work in the context of today? would it have made it better?

those are big things to grapple.

it's always easy to point and blame. it's always easy to look back in retrospect and find fault.

only those who are visionary can lead and create. those who dared to take that step out and say, "this way, follow me." it took more than looking at a crystal ball and then saying "ah-hah!"

to me, he is a leader who earned the respect and did a great job. we stand in justification of that.

clean & clear of the future

Mission partially accomplished. Cleared the kitchen cabinets with dearie’s help. I threw many of those disposable containers because they were cluttering my cabinets. There was no way to fix the broken corner of the cabinet, hence we only tried to salvage it by moving the load to the other corner. The cabinet containing biscuits is still uncleared. I am thinking I should get to it after we eat up most of the food inside first. Dearie helped me rearrange the condiments in the fridge a little too. I mopped the floor squeaky clean and the whole kitchen felt like a nicer place =)

I went on to wipe the study tables and filed some documents up. The study is not particularly a messy place because I have already done quite some throwing-away not too long ago.

The store room isn’t very messy either, apart from the towering newspaper pile. I am wondering how I can put the newspapers into good use, instead of just dumping them into the recycling bin. We may need some of it for the aircon cleaning. Thinking we may also do a good wipedown of the cabinets, table tops etc, at one go with aircon cleaning. The thought of a nice spanking clean home feels great.

The hr lady came to me to define some job benchmarks; defining ranks within the department by experience, scope and qualification. I thought it is a norm for companies to have a set of such benchmark.

I’ll be interested to see which position I fall into. Somehow the thought of my ex company is spurring me on to move up the ladder here. I have left that place and now one notch up here. I must not and will not allow myself to stagnate at this position. I want to work my way up. In a couple of years’ time I must reach the next checkpoint; be it senior accountant or accounts manager.

Maybe it’s my ego, but I want to be proud of myself that I made the right decision to move out of my ex company. I have been able to leap, although ex supervisor thought so little of me. I want to tell friends that to turn back and staying within their comfort zones is somewhat like marching back/on the spot. After a few decades, are you satisfied just staying on the same spot? The world is changing; evolving every second. Are you doing so too?

tricia's new toy

i've got a new toy.. for the domesticated aunty in me. isn't this a babe? it's a PANASONIC rice cooker. one which can cook porridge, quick cook and even steam a cake! wowwowowow. this is gorgeous. i better start cooking more at home. hehehe.

the weekend passed quickly, with alot of good food. i ate, ate and ate. who could possibly resist all the good food!

i have an impedus to clean the house. i want to clear out the whole cabinet under the stove and give it a good clean. i need a solution to the broken portion in the cabinet. like put something to stop it from breaking apart. i want to arrange all the empty plastic containers into a box or something because it is such an eye sore with so many of them lying around. i want to clean the study room because it feels dusty. clean the air cons too. am i coming down with obsessive compulsive disorder? i care to think dearie deserves a clean home to reside in. i will try my best upkeep our home well, although i am the person creating the mess most of the time, because i tend to move things in and out.

will want to plan out the weekend to clean the house. perhaps go to the flea. donate blood. buy nephew's birthday present. rest.

ok..better get back to work now..because i want to leave on time to cook rice with my new toy! woohoo! (sounds like playing masak masak)

a conforming bao

i thought about lunch. ba bao seemed good. $1.10, meaty and filling. i took my wallet and headed to the elevator. pressed the elevator button to go downstairs. however, i stopped short and turned back to office, took my mug and made myself instant cereal instead. and good thing, i saved $1.10 too.

with the change of the public transport fare system, i am paying $0.05 more per trip from home to work. that's 4.5% increase for me. only 60% of the population will benefit from this change. as i was telling dearie the other day, smrt/sbs transit are corporations with shareholders to be accountable to. how could they possibly implement a fare system that will be detrimental to them and eat into their profits? reading alot of complaints on the internet in response to the fare increase. these complaints amount to nothing because at the end of the day, all we will probably do is to accept and pay.

cycling is actually viable solution to alot of things.

1. we cut down pollution
2. we avoid the mad rush on buses/mrts
3. we won't be subjected to the pain of fare increases
4. we get to exercise. good for health. don't fall sick so easily. save on medical bills.

but..

1. singapore is so warm. by the time we cycle to work, we'll be perspiring. unless we work near to our offices.
2. singapore road is not cyclist-friendly. first threat comes from taxi drivers who aren't the most friendly of the bunch. on top of that, we also have impatient drivers who do not give a damn to cyclists.
3. there is no SAFE place to park bikes. no one released statistics of bike theft in singapore right? or probably too many of it have gone unreported.

so having circle around the bush, i am back to point zero. we are at the mercy of public transport. don't even think about owning a car because the rate of increase is more eye-popping.

it made me think about some countries i've travelled to. in japan, one can park his/her bike by the road side and not have to worry someone will come along and steal them. in australia, cyclists can wheel their bikes (don't have to be foldable bikes which reduces to a certain dimension) into trains.

i haven't heard of many companies advocating staff to exercise and make exercise a part of life. they will advocate overtime and finish your work more.

whine whine whine. at the end of the day, all of us just be obedient and conform to the norms.

dearie's bday

dearie and his very chocolaty birthday cake (fr Lil' Foot).

I treated dearie to this at ABC.

Dearie chomping down his chicken cutlet treat.

random pick from the brain

i took half day leave today and these were my random thoughts through the day.

- i saw uncle douglas on the mrt. the clown who used to humour children during church camps. i could see age on his wrinkled skin.

- first time on the circle line. so suaku. the trip from jurong east to serangoon then to clarke quay costs me $1.55.

- i thought the baker is a lady but it is a guy!! wow!

- my mummy is unhappy. i wish he disappeared from the face of this earth and save us all the agony.

- i think the surprise didn't go too well but hopefully the cake made up for it.

- i hope i made the day good for dearie.

- i was too tired to run today. will run tomorrow morning and evening if possible.

- i would like to have an electronic weighing scale as birthday present.

- another 12 days to 1/2 yr mark at present company. wow. i'm 1/4 across my goal.

- brain dead. want to lie in bed now.

big 3-O

Happy Birthday to you, dearie. You have reached the big 3-O!! (ok ok..i know you'll say it'll be my turn soon. =P)

blood sucker insurers

i am furious about myself. i never realised what kind of crap i got myself into all these years until i received the policy coupon payout from aia.

i got this savings policy 5 years ago and it gave me so called the "flexibility" to draw down on the 5th and 10th year. draw down they call it. DON'T EVER draw down. and by the way, please note that policy 'bonus' is on face amount of the policy, not whatever you have put in. they will tell you the bonus is accumulated, but it is accumulated on a FIXED face value + accumulated bonus (at 1.85% p.a).

They are giving me a 'coupon' payment. excuse me, what coupon payment. this is face value drawdown.

Ok, next they say projected value at maturity date. no matter how i compute, i am not getting the value there. i called the customer service and they tell me system is down, they can't generate the illustration. i don't need an illustration. i want to know how in the world this projected value is computed. $12k projected return? where is it? i am still seeing 1.85% bonus on face value. i don't see a change in my face value, still that pathetic $5k.

i am going back to study the GE one tonight.

I hate myself for being so ignorant. for not knowing how to do my sums.

Please be very careful how insurance companies pump up their returns to attract you to buy in with them. nothing is guaranteed in this world. and what is worse about non-guaranteed things is i am tied to it for 2 decades. i rather park my money with equities. at least i have liquidity. i can sell it off in an open market any moment.

I am not paying insurance companies to take my money and use it for their own benefit. i am such a fool. but a fool no more. from this day onwards, insurance agents better back off from me.

scrooge with pork

i am such a scrooge. i scoured 5 locations within yew tee just to find discounted hair conditioner. conclusion: ntuc still offers the best buys within yew tee vicinity.

i am such a weird scrooge. i am looking at that $10 note in my wallet and wondering if i should spend it on lunch. i have only $0.50 loose change and i am hoping to keep my $10 around, as long as possible. hence, i made myself a mug of milo+instant cereal+sugar to keep my hunger away. pretty filling though. good change from the oily meals i've been having.

i just finished reading my fundamental analysis book. yayy! now onto the next! at least i am making progress now.

to end off the entry, just to share a cold joke between dearie and i. no offence to all world cup fans. or to prk and por fans in particular.

while watching the world cup match between portugal and north korea, i made a mindless joke. Portugal was abbreviated by 'POR' while north korea was abbreviated by 'PRK' (short for People's Republic of Korea).

me: "Waa bb, it's a match between PORK! we have PORK without the K (POR) against PORK without the O (PRK)."

dearie: "not funny.."

me: "orh.." (sulk)

quote of the day 22/06/10

" The desire of knowledge, like the thirst of riches, increases with the acquisition of it" - Lawrence Sterne, 1760

i like this quote. it can't be more apt to what was on the top of my mind yesterday. we need to constantly thirst for more knowledge. the acquiring of new knowledge should fuel that thirst like a never ending cycle. =)

effective habits

All the best to dearie for his interview today. Hope it goes well..and hopefully this job will be something suitable. =)

3 more weeks to shm. That’s fast. Another 2 weekend of MR perhaps. Another 3 track workout. Race day.

I just remembered I am still holding on to alicia’s harry potter series and I’m stuck on the 4th book for a long long time. Oh man! How do I find discipline to do my reading? I still have 3.5more investment books plus 1 financial modeling book. I need to schedule my time so I find discipline to go through portions of them daily.

I am inspired by those who are making a lot of sense in the equity market. I need that hunger for more knowledge.

Felt abit out of the zone last few weeks. Was still looking at the board but didn’t know where to place our chips. Today the market is up. Our counters are faring pretty decent till now. Another hour to closing. Hope they hold up.

meantime, i need to remind myself.

1. read more. learn more.
2. save more.(save for investing. save for holiday!)
3. invest wisely.
4. work smart.
5. run hard.
6. eat healthy.
7. rest well.

thinklist

on the top of my head

1. i should develop my own fashion sense. right now it's all over the place. no character. boring.

2. i should not be eating so much. i am wolfing down alot of food these days. pretty clothes only look pretty on svelte bodies. but how to lose weight but not lose boobs?

3. holiday. i need a holiday in 2011.

4. need to save more. i should not be going to so many flea markets.

5. my reading has been slowing down. lazy lazy. 5 books on wait list. i need some discipline here.

6. should i start playing my piano again?

7. what about biking too? tag along with yenling?

how come i am so busy ah..so many things i want to do. or maybe i am just thinking too much.

vintage me?

i've been ogling at 'granny's day out' website. i love the vintage style i am seeing. but it seems to suit waif-like ladies better. i am short and chunky. i wonder how i would look in one of those flowy dresses.

i am dreaming of a whole wardrobe of vintage clothes. wowee. i think vintage has character. it is different and unique. and of course, it comes with pricier than those korean/taiwanese fashion.

been to the flea on sat at odeon. i am somewhat disappointed. apart from the necklace and earrings i bought for mum..i think i was hoping to find more..but not many things caught my attention. i only walked out with a $5 top and a pair of pretty earrings.

perhaps i should save my money up for my holiday in 2011. i think it will be more interesting to buy clothes from overseas.

birthday celebration for mum and dad was alot of eating. a-la-carte buffet at hosin jap restaurant and cake from emicakes. i am still bloated. it's a 1-meal day for us. -rubs her big rummy tum tum-

did 2 loops at macrit, with timing unexpectedly better than last week's. i think the finisher medal is slightly closer to reach now. i'm not expecting to do a sub-2. i will be happy to do a 2.12? (considering 6min pace).

i'm glad we are a part of safra running community. we have moved out of 2 other running groups and to train alone can be really boring at times. at least we now have a group to run with..and we are given adination cards to fill up. it's some reward scheme by adidas, which rewards runners that turn out for safra runs. collect x number of chops and u can collect freebies like shoe bags, water bottles. feel very aunty-ish..but it's another incentive to turn up for the runs regularly. i think we have a few friends at safra we can count upon. =)

work week starts tomorrow, again. we are getting closer to shm! can't wait to eat my hakka mee and lou su fen. haehaheea..how am i going to lose weight if i am going to eat like that. see la, how to go vintage, if i am looking like michelin mascot?

flea me

i am starting to enjoy flea markets. =) time to get some good and interesting buys!

this is happening on saturday. i already booked dearie's time to go down for it! yay! flea me!!

accomplished & growing

Feeling accomplished. I've completed the tax computation for mummy and all I need is for her to sign off and we can mail it in to iras. I enjoy doing tax computation, though it is really simple for mum's company in this case. Compiling the tax schedules, computing wear & tear, going through deductible and non-deductible expenses and income. My school days ambition was to become a tax consultant. The closest I've come to this ambition is now - filing tax for mummy. I still try to read the tax updates, look at budget tax concessions; keeping myself abreast to tax changes. I'm not hoping to become a tax consultant anytime soon, but I think tax is one important component in any business.


I've also set up the spreadsheet for mummy to keep her ledger on. It is linked to a tb, p&l and bs so that makes things alot easier. The only manual thing is to type the ledger and journal entries in. I actually tapped into the template amy has set up for one of our subsidiaries, of which books were not maintained within navision. I think it will make things alot easier for mummy, as she won't have to tediously handwrite the entries on ledger cards. It will make referencing a whole lot easier. Will need to go through the template with her this weekend. =)

I managed to close May's accounts pretty smoothly. I got the conso report out in 2 half-days. I also compiled the Jun costing forecast for review. Next up is to do a study on some significant expenses and also to compile the SOP. Want to get these out of the way before quarter reporting next month.

I am 3 days shy to my 5th month with the company. Looking in retrospect, i think i have grown and developed over these months. I am thankful for all the encouragement family and friends have given me during the first few difficult months. Family members who have listened to my endless rants, friends who have left comments to cheer me on. Though i cannot celebrate that I have 'graduated' in this position, but I think i give thanks that i made some progress at least. Each step I take brings me one step closer to that finishing point.

I used to think why am i given so much more to do; often things beyond my scope. I realised it is my honour that the management trusts me enough to hand those tasks to me. These are opportunities I can prove that I am capable to do over and beyond what an accountant is required to do. It's just a matter of perspective, isn't it? I can't help lamenting at times, but i am learning to take things into stride. Like Friedrich Nietzsche said, "If it doesn't kill you, it makes you stronger".

pain, movie, birthday wishes

We went to the tcm located at paya lebar road on Saturday. The treatment, which lasted less than 15mins, was excruciatingly painful. First the old lady doctor jabbed needles into my wrist. She made at least 7-8 needle holes with needles. My injured wrist jolted in pain, and that was just the start to it. She then used a suction cup, linked to a motor operated pipe. She placed the cup over the jabbed wrist and started sucking blood out. I could see my flesh popping up with the vacuum and blood oozed out of those needle holes. She did that for almost 10times and even left one to suck for a couple of minutes, while she talked to her assistant. I almost wanted to call out to her and asked if she forgot I was still lying there in pain.

After the sucking, my wrist swelled into one big blue-black lump. =( all that hit my pain threshold on a 7 out of 10. guess what she did next? She used her 2 thumbs and rubbed the swell down! Damn??! That was on the pain threshold of almost 9. I was in so much pain and agony. Pain. Pain. Pain. She then wrapped my wrist in gauze and that was the treatment. She then went on to tell me patients with similar injury usually recover after this. I think they won’t dare to come back even if they haven’t recovered. Haha. But I do hope it works..then the pain will be worth it. it’s Monday now and my bruised wrist is still painful to lateral movement.

Dearie gave mummy, dad and I a lift to my grandma’s place. I haven’t seen her in a long while. It was really good to pay her a visit. It made my heart ached a little, because I saw her getting up to see us off..and there was so much reluctance on her face. She just wanted a little of our time. Our presence made her very happy. She ate all the food we brought her. i hope we can make time to visit her more often. Sometimes with the busy-ness in our daily lives, we forget these important people around us.

We did our 2 loops at MR on Sunday. My legs were aching after 1 loop but I knew these 2 loops were important to the training. It can be so easy to just stop and give up, but it is persistence that requires more strength. I reminded myself that dearie has already started running his 2nd and I would definitely feel sore if he completed his 2 loops while I succumbed to laziness and stopped at 1. That pushed me on. Timing was not impressive but the completion was more important. With 4 more weeks to shm, these 2 loops made me feel more prepared. Now that I know I can finish the distance, it’s down to how fast I can finish. My target is to get 1 of the 30 medals. Shm will only be giving finisher medals to the first 30 lady runners who come in. i am aiming to get one of it.

We watched an interesting movie called “the Japanese wife” on Sunday. Bitter sweet story. somewhat impossible to happen..but life is about impossibles sometimes, isn’t it?

I am enjoying my weekends more these days..that I find them too short at times. A good weekend to me consist of:
- it has to be spent with dearie
- we spend time with my mummy. Have dinner with parents.
- we go for our runs, be it on our own or with safra
- we spend time resting. After the long run, we take a nice nap.
- we catch 1-2 home movies.

Oh yes, today is ma’s birthday. Wishing her a happy and blessed birthday! =D

easiest-hardest

I kept thinking about this phrase dearie said this morning.

“sometimes the easiest things become the hardest to do.”

He was commenting in relation to my attempts to achieve decent half-boiled eggs. So far they have come out either too cooked or too raw.

Getting the egg thawed at room temperature. Getting the right amount of heat with the right amount of time. Ensuring it has time to cool down and set into nice gooey form. Half boiled eggs should be easy to make..but for me, it is turning out to be a challenge instead.

I relate some parallelism with human relationships. They say the people who are closest to us are often more easily taken for granted.

I never missed my mum so much after I moved out to my own place. On the first night we stayed in our new flat, I cried because I missed seeing my mum. I called her to listen to her voice that night. Having stayed with my mum for 26 years I never thought too much about her presence. It was only when I moved away from seeing her, my heart ached. Somehow there is a space mum always filled, oblivious till she disappeared.

They say we tend to say the most hurtful words to those who are closest to us. I think it’s because we take it for granted that those loved ones will not mind what we said and that they will stick around no matter what. We don’t fear losing them, hence we don’t think twice about how our words or actions will impact them. That’s selfish. Because I don’t think you will outrightly criticize your boyfriend/girlfriend/potential date. So why should you do so to your own family/loved ones?

We remember to wish our friends the best and tell them how they will be missed. How about our own family? Have you stopped to tell your mother how much you appreciated all that she has done? Or just to remember how she gave us life? Or just for that simple yet delicious meal she took time to make for us?

Well, sometimes the easiest things become the hardest to do.

lazy bug go away

I hit a new high post-tokyo weekly mileage. 59kms. It could have been close to 70km if not for our MR run which was cut short due to the heavy rain.

Haven’t ran at MR for a long while since the hamstring injury and being back at it again feels refreshing. The air was good. The slopes were challenging as ever. We will be back to complete the 2 loops this Sunday.

Things at work have slowed down somewhat. The required reports are getting more complicated, which requires a lot of input from operational staff. Getting them to respond and do up forecast is daunting. I sent out the request for figures last week and requested the replies to be in by Friday. I’m more than half way through Monday and I have only received one respond. How am I going to get things moving when others are not contributing the required? I’ve been waiting for the manpower figures for 2 weeks and I am still not hearing anything from hr.

I feel frustrated because I am not able to make people move, even when it’s by orders from the director. I am just a small time accountant. So what can I do?

I thought the weekend was pretty rested. We spent a lot of time sleeping and I lazed so much that I didn’t get around doing work I planned to. i do have to get around quite a few things pretty soon.

Got to kick that lazy buggy. Get things going!!!!

I've got to do the tax filing for mummy. Read my books. Do some analysis of counters we're eyeing. (Ok..of all things i need to do..at least our training programme towards SHM is making some progress =D)

running wild

Dearie left early for KL this morning. It felt weird lying in bed without him around. His perfume lingered in the room; I shut the windows so I can keep the scent in. it made me smile.

The long weekend was full of pigging out and it made me feel almost like a..pig. food galore, I just stuffed myself full. I felt a lot heavier trying to run yesterday. Time to burn those fats off.

We’ve sent out the entry forms for seremban in july. That’s something to train towards. Though I am not aiming to do as well as last year, I hope I can prepare myself better for it. hence it will be a lot of macrit for us in the coming 6 weeks.

I received an additional allowance on top of the pay increment. I am thankful for it as having more around means I get to save more. I overspent last month as i spent all my pay increment on an early birthday present for mum. I am aiming to get dearie a good present so I hope my equities will rise in time for me to cash in on it. alternatively, I’m going to save enough this month for it.

Work is getting more challenging, with the director asking for more complex reports. today I am feeling better than yesterday. I am going to work on the reports required today. Start early, work swiftly and then leave on time to get to safra for my run.

That’s something to look forward to. =) time to start work now!

on holiday high

i woke up this morning 545am, thinking it was 645am. i quickly vacuumed and mopped the floor, rushing to finish by 705am so that i could shower for work.

when i pulled my mop out, i realised, hey..why is the sky still so dark. chey. it was 6am, not 7am.

that was silly. now at 650am (the correct time) and i am typing this entry before i get ready for work.

nice. our home is a little cleaner now, before we go back home to segamat for the long weekend.

attempted to make half boil eggs(2nd day attempt) for dearie but ended cracking it when i popped it into the pot. gosh. when am i going to get this right.

i'm all packed for home. packed for training. packed for work.

high on caffeine now.

safra training tonight. yay! running feels fun again, now that we are with safra.

half day work. half day meeting. safra run. go home. sleep a couple of hours. and it's home to family and alot alot of good food. yayyyy!! high on holiday!

beef noodles

When I was young, my parents would bring us to this beef noodles stall at beach road, fortnightly.

Because we did this so often, I can almost remember the sight, smell and taste of the beef noodles till this day.

The gravy was thick, gooey and dark in color. There were generous servings of beef in each bowl. There was a lot of crunch with the bean sprouts in them.

It looks nearly similar to the one in the photo here.

I’m not sure why, but I suddenly missed the beef noodles I savoured as a child. Maybe I miss being a young girl and how I eagerly waited for my parents to order that bowl of beef noodles for me.

Strangely, I stopped eating beef some years ago. Probably I felt eating beef is fattening and doesn’t help in my diet. I have this thought stuck on the top of my head that beef is hard to digest. Food that is hard to digest will stick onto my body as an extra piece of flesh.

People change with time. Preferences change. But family doesn’t change. =)

climbing coconut tree

I like the post on yahoo that highlighted the guidelines nwc recommended on sustainable wages.

Quoting from yahoo news: “The National Wages Council (NWC) is recommending companies to award sustainable wage increases to employees, taking into account their performance and prospects.”

Scrolling downwards you will find a whole list of comments posted by the public.

Remuneration is a weird thing. I never understand how management places a value on skills and qualification. It differs from company to company, industry to industry.

There will always be a wage disparity. People who can afford 7series BMWs while others cram on public transport.

Having a chance to understand business situation from the management in my company, one issue that plagues the company is manpower/wages. If the company is doing fantastic, the company may not hesitate as much to rewards its staff. However, if the company’s survival falls into the doldrums, then paying as much will only add to the financial burden on the company. But if the company doesn’t pay, people leave and it is hard to hire replacement.

People always compare. Like I will compare my package with my friends’. Wow. Variable bonus of x months. Wow allowances of $X00.

Who doesn’t want more? But what makes us worthy to have more?

So while I wish I could earn more, I also understand the get more means I must have the necessary skill set and experience to command that. If I am going to stay the same, refuse to learn and take up more, I certainly don’t think the management will find it justifiable to pay me more. While we lament why pay has stayed relatively the same for years, maybe it’s also time we examined if we have made much effort to move ourselves one step ahead to deserve more.

It’s a weird thing to see in the economy. While some lament they struggle to pay off the loans of their hdb, I see a long queue going into lv boutique. I see more bmws on the road than a decade ago. Perhaps the crux is the distribution of income. Wage disparity? Rich are getting richer. Poor are getting poorer. How to tip the balance over? We see exponential increase in taxes on higher income earners. But we don’t see very significant balancing.

Life is never fair, that’s the universal truth.

For dearie and I, we live by simple principles. Live within our means. Keep improving and moving forward. Keep learning. Save more. And treasure the time we have with our loved ones.

I like to envisage myself underneath a tall coconut tree. People are looking and pointing at the coconuts saying, “waaa..coconut. weather so hot. Can drink one so shiok.” Sure, I will like to enjoy a nice coconut drink too. But instead of looking and pointing, I want to start climbing up the tree. I believe, slowly, I will get to it. =)

staying awake

The pay adjustment came as a surprise, which I am thankful for.

Our equities are slowly picking up again, after going down into a trough. Let’s hope the rise is sustainable.

Christin will be heading off to Japan next month and I am green with envy. I miss Japan and will love to go for a holiday somewhere. My only consolation is the upcoming long weekend, during which we will make a trip home to Segamat.

We’re experimenting with mixing morning runs with safra evening runs, alternating days. Sounds weird. Feels weird. I wonder if our bodies can handle that. We laid off running in the morning last week (we were feeling tired to wake up early)..but started the routine today again.

I was fresh this morning, but somehow started to feel sleepy by noon. I succumbed to making a 2nd cup of coffee for the day. I’m sipping it while writing this entry. I know it’ll make sleeping difficult tonight but I’m just slipping into this standby mode if I don’t get my caffeine shot.

We’ll make our way home to Segamat on Fri morning, so we’ll still get to join safra on Thursday evening. There is no training on Sunday as many runners will be down at sundown. Good for us, coz it means we won’t be missing training with them. Meantime, we can still do our own long run at home =)

I find a lot of joy joining safra. Last Sunday, I was the only lady among 9 other guy runners. They were really patient, waited for me and so I never felt left behind.

i wonder if I was dreaming but as I ran this morning, I felt my strides get a little lighter. Haven’t felt like that in a long while.

Think I should get dearie to do some static exercises tonight. Chia reminded us all the static exercises we used to be grilled to do. They do make us stronger runners.

I still have 2 things on my list to work on. Analyzing the gp report and segregating the costing report. Closing will only take place next week, so I can still find some pockets of time to lay back and plan a little for the week.

We are still contemplating if we should join scsm. The only pull factor is that most, if not all, safra runners will be joining this event. Training with them towards this race seems the most natural thing to do.

But I’m more inclined to do overseas races, to be honest. I thought my money is better spent on a different experience. Even racing in Malaysia will be nicer than doing a local race which will bring me through familiar routes. Gee, I’m torn.

Seremban half will be nice to do but I’m not reading much about it yet. The Star covered it today on its online news. I reckon registration should commence soon.

I’m not seeing much of others we can join. Newton run at KL in sept? don’t see myself picking up biking anytime soon, so duathlons are still not within consideration. Penang marathon? But it seems not fantastic from what dearie experienced last year. Hmm. Will discuss with dearie on this soon, so we can plan training towards the races.

Want to plan for holiday next year too. I so need one. Taiwan. Korea. Japan. Anywhere.

This post is so haphazard. my thoughts are simply random. i guess you will understand it, somehow.

pant pant

run with safra jurong yesterday was good, although there were just 7 of us. i haven't ran a fast 9km for a long while. my 8km runs at the park connectors are more than often leisure ones.

i panted hard near the end and i could feel myself struggled down the last 800m or so. it was an uncomfortable feeling, but strangely, i actually liked that. i missed having that feeling in fact. the last time i experienced it was during the days with mileage.

the ice cold drinks provided was a pleasant surprise. the night was so humid and i gulped down a few cups of drinks. the hot shower was another good thing we had too. we met with 3 other runners and went for dinner near pioneer mrt. it was simply fun chatting with them and one of them offered us a ride home. thank u, eng hua(if i never spell your name wrong).

i felt satisfied from the run. it was like a push for me to get my inertia for running again. nice people really made the process easier. and for now, we will try our best to settle into the new running group.

today's friday and i feel pretty laid back. my 2 staff are on leave and i'm pretty much on my own. looking forward to a nice rest over the weekend..and long run on sunday with the running group again! =D

thorns

there are bound to be irksome people in every company. i have learnt the fine skill of blocking tai-chis. don't think you can always push work, which is rightfully yours, to my department.

i'm thankful i have staff who stand with me, united. at least when we block, we block it together. don't come and try walk all over us. i will deal with things at my level, because i won't stoop low to try and make u look bad in front of our bosses. I want to let time be the judge for abilities.

i overlooked on a fine detail to the signing of the legal documents. i felt my face hit right smack on the wall. i hope my boss doesn't deduct my pay for the extra we might have to fork out to get the lawyer come another time. =(

dark rain clouds loom the sky (again?!). seems like chances to run tonight will be slim. backup plan: skipping and play wii.

gee. the whole day feels so gray, like the sky outside.

the sky's playing a joke on us

the weather has been like a wailing baby. it cries once in the morning and once in the evening.

we travelled down to boon lay yesterday, only to find the place raining. we made a u-turn back home and the sky started to clear. upon reaching yew tee, there was not a single drop of rain in sight.

this morning we woke up at 5-ish and got into our running gear. grabbed a few biscuits and headed out. plitter platter. the rain started to fall again. again, for a second time, we retreated home, vowing we will have to catch up on our mileage this evening.

after breaking my 50k weekly mileage mark last week, i'm going to do badly this week. with mon, tues and wed morning gone due to rain, my 50k mark is falling beyond reach.

i hate the rain. it spoils my plans and makes me grumpy. and i hate how it makes my leather shoes all soggy.

will the sky stop playing jokes on us?

treading with fear

Expectations at work have been scaling. More is required. More work is given. Responsibilities have increased significantly too. I feel somewhat lost because I don’t know where to start.

Help to check and balance the operations? Taking control? Am I in a position to do so? I am but a mere accountant. I am probably just that little dwarf behind the FC. Probably the director meant the fc should be taking more charge. I am merely an assistant. But from the kind of workload she already has, her plate is nearly full. I just feel inadequate to execute those tasks that were discussed in the quarter review yesterday.

I feel somewhat overwhelmed and fearful. Dearie tells me to take one task at a time. Each task feels big. It’s like hugging a big tree whose trunk I can’t wrap my arms fully over.

Big tasks present big opportunities. However, are these big hats too big for my head?

I cast a lot of doubts on myself. I still can’t frame myself beyond the accountant’s scope. I have barely scaled the hill and I am told I have to climb a mountain. Yet I know well, if I took the challenge and made a good climb, I might reach the summit of the mountain..and what lies ahead could be better than what I have bargained for.

Yet for now, I am still struggling with myself. How do I keep up? I am fearful of taking a wrong step and end up in the deep end of the pool.

up and running

the run with safra jurong on sunday was great! it's been a while since we ran with a group and the turnout was a gregarious bunch. there was a lot of laughter, runners enjoying the company of other like-minded ones.

running with people helped me forget of the blistering heat. i just tried to keep up. there were people i could keep pace with and i'm glad i didn't get dropped behind. there were a couple of pit stops, of which were photoshoot and drink stops.

there was even a breakfast spread prepared after the run, which came much as a surprise.

the route was pretty interesting; going into ntu and around jurong west.

i thought the organisers did a fantastic job and the runners were orderly and their spirits were kept high throughout the entire 2.5hrs.

I enjoyed meeting all the friends, both new and old. =)

It made me miss the days i trained with mileage. i miss evelyn, michelle, jan, gabor and many others..they are a very nice group of friends whose company i've enjoyed.

This will be another new chapter in running for dearie and i. We will be joining other upcoming runs with safra jurong =) A new chapter is nothing without the commitment to hold through the journey.

american breakfast at home(yew tee)

this was saturday's american breakfast at home,yew tee. hehe. i think bb liked it quite alot and it was very easy to make. =)

i feel like a million dollars

i got my confirmation today! yayyy.. an early one. probation is 6 months but i got my confirmation on the 4th month.

had a good talk with my boss and there is really so much i can learn from her. she is really one gem boss to have. Interestingly, i was emailing with my 2 ex-colleagues and 1 of them who is still with the company ranted about my ex-boss. She will be the last of our three-some gang to leave the company, coming start of next month.

my current company is small, not very cash-rich and not some big mnc. but i give thanks i have a good boss and nice colleagues. =) so that's really something to be grateful of..coz i have been through worse days with my ex-boss.

I made another $27 from equities. I was too fretful to hold it through the weekend. not too bad, enough to bring dearie and mummy for a treat to celebrate my confirmation.

I'll be trying out a new recipe tonight.. istimewa..on my guinea pig dearie.

Ah... i feel like a million dollars! (or maybe, 27 dollars)..

better person

For 4 consecutive days, we pressed on. We were out before 6am and we ran. We ran for 4 mornings in a row. I’m so proud of us!

It takes a few repetitions to get the hang of it. I’m enjoying the morning runs. Actually I kind of prefer it over evening runs. I am usually very tired after a long day at work. Often, I have to work overtime and that will disrupt my runs. By the time I get home, run, have dinner, wash up and finally settle down, it’s already 11+pm. The night is too short for so many things. If possible, I will love to stick to this new routine. Let’s see how long we can hold this off. =)

Dinner has been very healthy too. After the yummy chicken and veg dish we had on Tuesday, we had veg and eggs yesterday. We skipped the rice, cutting down on the excess carbo.

Ahh..i’m feeling better as a person already! Hahaha.. I want to cross that 40k mark this week. It has been far too long since I've last done so.

i'm never alone

I had a long day+night at work yesterday. I dragged myself home at 915pm, feeling lethargic. When I got home, I smelled the fragrance of cooked garlic. Stepping in, dearie dished out a plate of colourful stuff which I could not quite make out what it was. When I sat down and rummaged through the colourful pile, I found generous chunks of chicken with carrots, garlic and onion. I loved it, every bit of it. Thank you for the wonderful dinner, dearie. It really brightened up my entire day.

He has been very forgiving with the things I do, though he does not always agree. I made some wrong decisions but he still stood with me through it.

He made a trip down to lot 1 to get me some tonics, knowing the monthly ordeal was tormenting me badly.

When I have a bad day, the one thing I crave was a hug from him.

I cannot imagine a day without you. =)

blue monday made blue-er

i am angry with myself. i accidentally deleted my entire investment folder from my thumbdrive last friday. it's gone. all gone.

i tried to recover the files with the file recover software. the first one could locate the deleted files and seemingly recovered them but all were not able to be opened.it had some file format error message.

then i downloaded 2 more file recover softwares but running the scans, the files were not located at all. =( it might be due to the first software?

i don't know. i feel so lost. i hate that feeling. now i got to start from scratch again. our bond investment calculations. our shares investments. my mum's investments. all the calculations were inside. all my formulae. all. gone.

ahhhh..what a lousy way to start the morning and week. oh man. someone give me something to smile about..please =(

mum, run, holiday

Yesterday was mother’s day. dearie and I went to the shop to have dinner with her. i’m glad we went there despite of the heavy rain because I think spending time with her was the least I could do.

Happy mother’s day, mummy.

We went for our run this morning, instead of doing so in the evening. I like the coolness of the morning and sleeping early the night before meant I actually felt pretty fresh. I’m not too sure if dearie enjoyed it because he kept perspiring profusely after the run. He continued to drip even after we got to the mrt. We do need a huge freezer to cool him down after the run and stop him from perspiring so much.

We will be joining safra jurong for its launch run this coming Sunday. I am looking forward to run with other people. It is also a motivation for me to speed up, as I know I have slowed down tremendously since Tokyo marathon. My runs have become slow jogs these days. Good thing about jogs is I don’t sustain injury from them. I don’t feel my muscles tangled up in a tensed mess.. I don’t feel my knees in pain. =)

I think we will see some familiar faces in the crowd..and it should be more leisure than competitive to join safra. It’s a good change for us. A new group to join. New friends to make. Maybe gain some momentum..and have like minded people to push the distance with. With safra jurong not too far away, I am also tossing with the idea of joining them for the weekday runs too. Not too sure if dearie will want to do so..but we’ll join Sunday and see how it goes.

I am planning for a holiday next year..but it seems that to plan for one is hard. I have to consider about audit.. agm.. quarter reporting.. conso.. all the stuff I need to do at work. Eliminating all those, I have barely much days left when I will not be strapped. Ahhh..i’m going to plan for one nevertheless. Taiwan.. korea..anywhere. I deserve one holiday every year!

hippo and her waist

oh no oh no..i need to lose weight! dearie bought me new dresses..and they are pretty small..i'll cry if he brings them back and i can't squeeze into them. =(

hippo needs to find her waist.

i can imagine the horror i'll be getting after i get my weighing machine and step and them. -braces herself-

i'll buy a weighing machine tonight. i'm going to step onto each of them..and try them out. the one which reflects the least weight will be bought! =P (i live in the world of self delusion)

pink lipgloss

I lost my pink lip gloss on Saturday. It just disappeared and I can’t find it.

I sold them off today, shoring up lesser than what we could have gotten last week. But it was a gamble. Either we got more or lesser from it. But thankful at least we got some.

The other one is on a downhill slide. I’ll just hold it for now. It will take a long while before things turn around.

I made mistakes at work and I feel unhappy about it. Stupid tricia. Just when I thought I made one step forward, I took two steps back.

I feel engulfed with flesh. I want to get a weighing scale to help me start getting back in shape.

I want to go for a long run tonight. Just run till I’m tired so I can quickly fall asleep. The bed feels so empty without dearie.

I’m trying to imagine I’m at Disneyland too.

shhhhh

my staff commented my teleconversation were highly audible. i better learn to keep my volume down..and those things that should not be discussed in office and during working hours, i must remind myself to keep quiet about them.

shhhhhhhhhhh...

better stick to emails, sms and msn for now. =P